IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The best way to get people to use their cars less is to make them pay a road toll to drive on busy roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #cars #road #toll #drive #roads
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Some
people
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 argue that if we want to discourage
people
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 from using their
cars
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, it is the best way to let them pay a
toll
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 on busy
roads
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. I completely agree with
this
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 statement because
people
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 usually are not interested in paying high amounts of money on
roads
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, and if
this
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 happens,
people
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 will try to find alternative ways to travel. If
people
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 have to pay a high amount of
toll
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 on
roads
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, they will not be interested in spending a high amount of money
while
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 travelling. Busy
roads
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 and highways generally demand road tolls, and if it is high, many individuals cannot bear that expense.
As a result
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,
people
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 will not be encouraged to bring their
cars
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 on the
roads
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.
For example
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, in Melbourne, Australia, many highways demand a huge
80 dollars
Correct your spelling
80-dollar
toll
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 per 10 kilometres, which restricts many car users from using their
cars
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 during peak hours.
Moreover
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, if
people
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 have to pay a large amount of
toll
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, they will try to find alternative
transport
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 options for them. Each big city throughout the world has advanced public transportation facilities, which the general public can use
instead
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 of using their personal
cars
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. The use of the public
transport
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 system will encourage them not to bring their personal
cars
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 on the
roads
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.
For instance
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, many Bangladeshi citizens depend on the public
transport
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 system for their daily use, only because they try to avoid paying high tolls on the
roads
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. In conclusion, I fully agree with the point that if citizens have to pay a road
toll
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, they will be less interested in using their
cars
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.
This
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 is because
people
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 do not want to spend much money on
roads
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, and they will find alternative
transport
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 options.
Submitted by rahman_rehana on

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coherence cohesion
To further enhance the logical structure, you can aim for more seamless transitions between your points. This can improve the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
Include more varied sentence structures to enrich the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. This will make your response even more engaging and clear.
introduction conclusion present
Your introduction is clear and sets the stage effectively for your argument.
supported main points
You have provided relevant examples to support your main points, particularly the use of public transport in Bangladesh and toll costs in Australia.
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