The increase use of mobile phone and computers makes people lose the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#phone #computers #people #ability #face

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Sophisticated technology has changed the way of communication drastically.

However

, it is an argued issue whether the utilisation of these gadgets has dominated

people

's sense of socialization. I agree with the notion owing to the surge of electronic devices and the prevalence of online communication among

people

. Commencing with the most prominent reason why

people

have more desire to speak online rather than face to face . Since most of the talks encompass lectures, interviews and other personal issues or professional meetings are conducted online rather than face-to-face.

Furthermore

, it makes

people

bereft of natural inabilities to talk with another person.

Additionally

,It can be illustrated that today's generation finds it an arduous task to communicate with strange

people

when they have to deal with customers .

Furthermore

, if they see someone who needs help they feel

hesitated

Replace the word

hesitant

show examples

to help him.

Consequently

, it jeopardises not only their career opportunities but

also

their quality of life. Another worth considering reason is the hectic schedule .

Due to

electronic glitches, they won't spend their quality time with other members.

Moreover

instead

of relying upon phones and computers solely for operational tasks, every household chore, and relishing free time , is done with the help of mobile phones and laptops.

For instance

, games like Pubg and Ludo, are used by a myriad of dwellers to attain amusement. Ergo, gadgets have left them with no time to look for something else.

To conclude

although

electronic device possessions have become an inevitable part of everyday life.It is true that

due to

the innovation of technology, physical interaction has been demolished.

Submitted by harjass308 on Fri Aug 16 2024

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task achievement

Good job presenting the issue and taking a clear stance. Try to incorporate more specific and relevant examples to strengthen your argument. For instance, provide data or individual stories to exemplify the impact of technology on face-to-face communication.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the clarity of your ideas by crafting more detailed and logically interconnected paragraphs. Make sure each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next, maintaining a clear narrative throughout the essay.

coherence cohesion

Although your introduction and conclusion are solid, the main body would benefit from better organization and development of points with supportive evidence. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea supported by specific details.

task achievement

Your introduction and conclusion effectively frame your argument and provide a comprehensive overview of your position on the impact of technology on face-to-face communication.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is clear. You've clearly divided the essay into sections that tackle different aspects of the issue.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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The increase use of mobile phone and computers makes people lose the ability to communicate face to face. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

In many large cities, people have to spend hours driving in heavy traffic every day. What are the effects of this on society and the individual? What can be done about it? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The world has many towns and cities constructed in previous centuries that were more suitable and livable for people in those times than they are now. What problems will this cause? What can be done to solve these problems?

Some people believe that children should study all subjects at school, while others think they should only study subjects they are good at or find interesting. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that woman should take part in the military or the police force, but other oppose to this idea. Discuss both views give your own opinion and examples.