IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Cultural tourism, where people travel in order to visit museums, monuments, and archaeological sites among other things, is a growing industry. Having so many visitors may sometimes benefit a nation’s cultural heritage, but can also cause problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Several countries like India , Spain, Jordan and many more which are rich in cultural
sites
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 promoting
tourism
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 and the airline industry have encouraged
this
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 by reducing the fares for international travel.The Internet has too fueled cultural significance across the globe.All these factors lead to an increase in cultural
tourism
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 .
However
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, there is an argument that it is beneficial or has led to concerns.
This
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 essay will elucidate both viewpoints
along with
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 my own viewpoint. To commence with,cultural exploration promotes fraternity.People from different parts of the world gather and form permanent bonds of friendship.
For instance
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,Europeans visiting to Taj Mahal of India will be unofficial ambassadors and
also
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 spread the goodwill of the Indian culture.
Secondly
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, it helps to develop a feeling of respect .To illustrate
this
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,tourists from developed countries visiting poor countries like Egypt will have the feeling of respect after seeing the beauty of the pyramids of Giza.
Lastly
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, travel is
also
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 responsible for the sustenance of many tourist operators,guides, hotels and local people. Despite of above benefits,one big issue related to visiting historic monuments,
sites
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 and museums is damage to property.There is strong evidence of people scribbling names on the walls and stairs in Kathmandu.Ajanta, Ellora's paintings have been damaged by the flashlights of cameras used by tourists.
In addition
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, tourists are seasonal which
also
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 leads to pressure on various facilities available in tourist locations.
For example
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,
tourism
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 is at its peak during the Summer holidays which will lead to a large accumulation of crowds putting stress on water and food supplies at various locations. In a nutshell,
tourism
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 to cultural and historic
sites
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 has both benefits and drawbacks .
Nonetheless
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,in my view,the advantages outweigh the drawbacks and cultural exploration is good for a country's economy but needs to be regulated to prevent damage to cultural
sites
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 .

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure consistency in using connectors and cohesive devices throughout the essay to enhance flow.
Task Achievement
Refine the clarity of ideas presented in the body paragraphs for stronger arguments.
Task Achievement
The essay provides a balanced discussion with both advantages and drawbacks of cultural tourism.
Coherence and Cohesion
The introduction sets a clear context and frames the discussion effectively.
Task Achievement
Relevant examples like the Taj Mahal and pyramids of Giza are provided to support the points.
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