IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Many students choose to take a gap year before starting university, to travel or gain work experience. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is in trend
this
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 days to have some years
gap
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 before
further
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study
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. It is believed that, students love to have year
gap
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 before their college degree, to visit as well to gain on
field
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 experience.
Therefore
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, it is an argued issue whether to
study
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 continuously or to have some year of space between the studies. I partly accord with
this
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 notion.
To begin
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 with the most prominent reason, it increases the maturity, as you should have to deal with the various obstracles that popup during your
work
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.
For example
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: I have taken 1 year of
gap
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 between my higher
study
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 and thanks to my job that now I can handly furious customers who comes to my counter for deposit or withdrawal of cash.
Additionally
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, being on
work
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field
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 means you are out of academic knowledge which test those gained education in the main ground. Is is often found that there is vast difference between what we learn and what is actually being applying in the
work
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field
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.
For instance
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: I only gain theories how a banking system works but after working in the same area I am clear how does those all actually works.
Furthermore
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, when there is a
gap
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 between your studies you it is often found that you willnot be able to continue your higher education as your mind doesnot allows you to perform a pressure
work
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 alongside your studies. Like: Nurses who have to
work
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 whether it is a day or night not having a time to concentration
as a result
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 it hampers their
further
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 degree.
In addition
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 to
this
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 if you become lucky enough to have a high earner that you have dreamed of
then
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 your heart doesnot allows you to
study
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 as you are already getting what you have thought of. In conclusion,
Although
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 there are a lot of demerit points of not continuing a degree. I believe that there are alot of strong points to support
this
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 statement like on
field
Use synonyms
 training, maturity.

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task achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure to fully address all parts of the prompt. Try to include more relevant examples that directly connect to the reasons you provide.
coherence cohesion
Enhance coherence and cohesion by improving the logical flow of your arguments. Use linking words and phrases to connect your ideas more smoothly.
coherence cohesion
Expand on examples to strengthen the support of your main points. Provide more detailed explanations and insights around the examples you choose.
coherence cohesion
Your essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which provide a good framework for your ideas.
task achievement
You have addressed the prompt by discussing both potential advantages and disadvantages of taking a gap year.
task achievement
You have included personal examples to illustrate your points, which helps to make your argument more relatable.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • immersive experience
  • perspectives
  • empathy
  • societal norms
  • practical understanding
  • motivation
  • networking
  • recharge
  • dedication
  • forge meaningful relationships
  • financial independence
  • emotional well-being
  • self-confidence
  • adaptability
  • open-minded
  • mentorships
  • motivated
  • prepared
  • volunteering
  • internships
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