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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make?Has this become a positive or negative development.

#people #technology #relationships #become #development
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In recent years, technological advancements have revolutionized the way
people
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 interact and connect with one another.
While
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 these changes have made
communication
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 more accessible and efficient, they have
also
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 raised concerns about their impact on the quality of human
relationships
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. In my opinion,
this
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 transformation is largely negative
due to
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 the decline in face-to-face
interactions
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 and the weakening of personal connections, despite some notable advantages. One significant drawback of technology-driven
communication
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 is the reduction in face-to-face
interactions
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, which are vital for building meaningful
relationships
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. Many
people
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 now prefer texting or using social media over meeting in person, as these methods are perceived as quicker and more convenient.
For instance
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, a survey conducted by the Pew Research Center revealed that nearly 70% of adults believe that social media has decreased the quality of personal
interactions
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.
This
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 reliance on digital platforms often leads to superficial connections, as deep
relationships
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 typically require physical presence and non-verbal cues
such
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 as body language and tone of voice.
Consequently
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,
people
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 may struggle to form strong bonds, especially when initiating new friendships or partnerships.
On the other hand
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, advancements in technology have undeniably improved accessibility and convenience in
communication
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. Video calls and messaging apps allow individuals to stay connected with loved ones across the globe.
For example
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, international students studying abroad can easily maintain close
relationships
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 with their families through platforms like Zoom or WhatsApp.
Additionally
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, these technologies enable
people
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 to share real-time updates and express emotions through features
such
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 as emojis and video chat, which can enhance the feeling of closeness despite physical distance.
However
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,
while
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 these tools offer convenience, they should not replace the richness of in-person
interactions
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. The long-term consequences of reduced face-to-face
communication
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 are concerning. Over-reliance on digital methods may hinder the development of essential social skills, particularly among younger generations.
For instance
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, children who grow up primarily interacting through screens might struggle with empathy and effective conflict resolution in real-life situations.
Furthermore
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, the decline in in-person gatherings could erode community bonds, making societies more fragmented over time.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure all main ideas are introduced effectively in the introduction and summarized in the conclusion to reinforce your argument.
coherence cohesion
Use a variety of cohesive devices to link ideas smoothly between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
While examples provided are relevant, consider adding more varied examples from diverse scenarios to enrich the essay.
task achievement
Maintain a balanced discussion of both positives and negatives for a more nuanced view.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a clear introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the discussion.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure is evident with each paragraph supporting the main argument, supplemented by relevant examples.
task achievement
The response effectively addresses the task, presenting both sides of the argument along with personal opinion.
task achievement
Ideas are expressed clearly and comprehensively, making the essay easy to follow.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technology
  • interact
  • relationships
  • connectivity
  • communication
  • online
  • face-to-face
  • friendships
  • romantic relationships
  • family dynamics
  • positive
  • negative
  • development
  • effects
  • formation
  • ease
  • impacts
  • communities
  • connect
  • interaction
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