In some countries university students live at home with their family while they study, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do you think the benefits of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from own knowledge or experience.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In some countries
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
college
students
Use synonyms
stay with their families
while
Linking Words
they
studying
Wrong verb form
study
show examples
,
whereas
Linking Words
in others, they move to another place
for taking
Change preposition
to take
show examples
their classes. There are many advantages
nor
Correct word choice
and
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
disadvantages of living away from
home
Use synonyms
, but I believe the benefits outweigh the drawbacks for
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
better future. Some people may think that living away from
home
Use synonyms
can lead to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
loneliness
due to
Linking Words
the struggle with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adapting
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
a new environment that
totally
Add a missing verb
is totally
show examples
different from their comfort zone.
Students
Use synonyms
who pursue their study abroad may feel isolated without
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
family support especially when they are facing hard times to follow the lessons there.
Moreover
Linking Words
, if the
students
Use synonyms
come from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
low-income families
then
Linking Words
they will face obstacles in managing their living expenses.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others consider that moving to other cities or countries will increase our independence and life
skills
Use synonyms
, especially in managing our
finance
Fix the agreement mistake
finances
show examples
, time and cooking
skills
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the facts about the most well-known universities with better
curriculum
Fix the agreement mistake
curricula
show examples
and networking
opportunities
Use synonyms
are located in bigger cities.
For example
Linking Words
, I felt happy to continue my
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
UGM Yogyakarta because they provide many
opportunities
Use synonyms
to have internships in
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
institutions and
also
Linking Words
giving
Wrong verb form
give
show examples
a lot of academic resources
through
Change preposition
apply
show examples
online and offline that can
be access
Change the verb form
be accessed
show examples
easily by the
students
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the power of their
alumnee
Correct your spelling
alumnae
alumni
is so strong and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
the fresh graduates gain
connection
Fix the agreement mistake
connections
show examples
to some popular jobs that
benefits
Change the verb form
benefit
show examples
their future
carreer
Correct your spelling
careers
. As I explained
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
living away from
home
Use synonyms
may
brings
Wrong verb form
bring
show examples
homesickness and financial
strugles
Correct your spelling
struggles
but it is just a temporary feeling,
whereas
Linking Words
the
upgrade
Replace the word
upgraded
show examples
skills
Use synonyms
and
opportunities
Use synonyms
gained
last
Linking Words
a lifetime. Many
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
successful professionals can be
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
their best because they had experiences studying away from
home
Use synonyms
that enhance their independence and
skills
Use synonyms
. In conclusion, despite the financial and emotional challenges, I believe the benefits of independence and
persoal
Correct your spelling
personal
development
along with
Linking Words
the career
opportunities
Use synonyms
outweigh the drawbacks.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Enhance the flow of your arguments by using a wider range of cohesive devices.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that all main points are fully supported with detailed examples or explanations.
coherence cohesion
Consider structuring your essay with clearly defined paragraphs dedicated to each main idea, to aid the logical progression.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task effectively and provides both advantages and disadvantages of the topic, with a clear stance that benefits outweigh the drawbacks.
task achievement
The essay includes a personal example which enriches the discussion and exemplifies the argument about better curriculum and networking opportunities.
coherence cohesion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of the essay and restates the author’s position in a clear manner.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • self-reliance
  • finance management
  • exposure
  • broaden horizons
  • open-minded
  • adaptability
  • conducive environment
  • isolation
  • homesickness
  • financial burden
  • household duties
  • academic responsibilities
  • personal growth
What to do next:
Look at other essays: