Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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In recent years, the approach of using traditional methods of treatment has grown over the alternative of visiting doctors.

While

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traditional methods have proven to be successful in some ways, I believe that following modern science must be the number one choice.

To begin

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, throughout

history

Add a comma

history,

show examples

we see numerous attempts to overcome physical

illness

Use synonyms

via spiritual and religious beliefs and methods,

whereas

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some of these attempts succeeded, and the majority failed and led to even more devastating results.

For instance

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, the shaman in Asian history, who is a person with great knowledge and wisdom and is believed to have connections to the other world, has caused a lot of problems physically and mentally when trying to treat

illness

Use synonyms

This

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is because he uses certain plants and ingredients that have no relation to the suffered disease but in most cases worsen it.

Furthermore

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, convincing people that a spirit has altered their body might cause an existential crisis and disbelief.

On the other hand

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, other than usual healthcare services, some ways have proven to overcome

illness

Use synonyms

without the doctors’ intervention.

For example

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, recent studies have shown that the “placebo effect” is real. The placebo effect works on convincing the patients’ brains that they are being treated with real medicine when actually they are not, simulating the brain to treat the

illness

Use synonyms

automatically. Despite the scientific acceptance of

this

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method, going to the doctor should be our number one choice, as some diseases,

such

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as cancers, get worsened if left untreated over time, leading to devastating results and worsening symptoms. In conclusion,

whereas

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seeking professional medical care must always be our first option, we cannot deny the positive effect of certain unprofessional yet scientifically proven treatments.

m.mahmoud.2005Sat Dec 28 2024

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coherence cohesion

Work on enhancing the logical structure of your essay. Ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with clear transitions.

task achievement

For task achievement, ensure that your ideas are more comprehensively developed with supporting details and examples.

task achievement

The essay addresses both sides of the argument by considering the potential positive roles of alternative medicines.

coherence cohesion

A relevant example of traditional versus modern medical practices is employed to strengthen your argument.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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9
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

alternative medicines
treatments
positive development
negative development
health problems
usual doctor
access
personalized approach
holistic well-being
lack of regulation
evidence-based research
proper medical treatment

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Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Include an introduction and conclusion

In many countries, students take a year gap after finishing school and work or travel during this period. Should students take a gap year before attending universities? What are the advantages and disadvantages of it?

“Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.”

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages?

Many young children have unsupervised access to the internet and are using the internet to socialise with others. This can lead to a number of dangerous situations which can be threatening for children. What problems do children face when going online without parental supervision.

People in your area are having problems with their internet connections. Write a letter to this company which provides the connection. In your letter Describe the problems. Explain how they are affecting people Say what the company should do to help.