In many countries around the world, life expectancy is increasing. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion.
Nowadays,
people
can live more years than before and in many parts of the Use synonyms
world
there is demographic Add a comma
world,
evidency
about it. Correct your spelling
evidence
This
could bring advantages as each person could live and spend more Linking Words
time
with their Use synonyms
relatives
ones, even though there Change to a genitive case
relative's
relatives'
is
Change the verb form
are
also
some concerns about the high demand Linking Words
on
health systems services, but Change preposition
for
Linking Words
at
the end, the Change preposition
in
increasing
Replace the word
increase
of
Change preposition
in
life
expectancy has positive impacts Use synonyms
in
our society.
One of the main disadvantages Change preposition
on
with
a high expectation of Change preposition
of
life
is that health Use synonyms
systems
services will be Fix the agreement mistake
system
on
high demand and without enough resources and professional Change preposition
in
people
Use synonyms
such
as doctors and nurses, it could bring Linking Words
to
a collapsed system. Change preposition
about
For instance
, there are some Linking Words
kind
of diseases that are more probably to Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
developed
in older age like certain types of cancer and with Change the form of the verb
develop
a
increased Change the article
an
of
Change preposition
apply
life
expectancy it could be necessary to take care more than before of Use synonyms
Linking Words
this kind
of diseases.
Fix the agreement mistake
these kinds
On the other hand
, If Linking Words
people
live longer, they can enjoy more their Use synonyms
life
not only for themselves, Use synonyms
Linking Words
also
to share with their relativesCorrect word choice
but also
ones
, that brings the possibility in families that grandparents can rise and teach their customs and traditions Correct pronoun usage
apply
with
their grandchildren. Change preposition
to
Linking Words
At
the end, an increase in Change the preposition
In
life
expectancy is given Use synonyms
as a result
Linking Words
that
Correct word choice
apply
the
age is not longer an impediment, because Correct article usage
apply
people
could have more Use synonyms
time
to realize themself, Use synonyms
for example
in a professional career, but Linking Words
also
, to be able to spend more Linking Words
time
of their Use synonyms
life
with their families.
In conclusion, the average of age Use synonyms
in
older Change preposition
apply
people
has increased in certain countries and it could Use synonyms
be
an impact on the health system, but we should focus on what really matters because Verb problem
have
Linking Words
at
the end it gives Change preposition
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
the possibility to spend more Use synonyms
time
with their Use synonyms
relatives
ones and Change to a genitive case
relative's
relatives'
also
to realize Linking Words
themselfs
.Correct your spelling
themselves
Submitted by mabetancurgu on
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task achievement
Work on developing your ideas more fully. Provide more specific examples and details to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Improve coherence by maintaining a clearer logical structure throughout the essay. Use more linking words to connect your ideas.
task achievement
Be aware of minor grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement and word choice.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, providing a good framework for your arguments.
task achievement
You successfully address both the advantages and disadvantages of increasing life expectancy.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.