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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that schoolchildren should be made to wear a uniform. Others feel that children should be free to choose their own clothes. Discuss both sides of the argument and say whether you agree with pupils wearing uniforms. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #schoolchildren #uniform #children #clothes #argument #pupils #uniforms
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Are school
uniforms
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 really necessary? Some people argue that wearing school
uniforms
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 is a must,
while
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 others believe that it is just a restriction keeping young children away from expressing their personalities. In my opinion, children need to keep wearing
the
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apply
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uniforms
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, as it teaches them important lessons that will become vital for them in the future. The main point brought up during
this
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 argument, supporting the importance of
uniforms
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, is the fact that it simply teaches pupils to follow rules. At
this
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 age, it is essential for children to learn that rules are to be followed; learning that ensures they will be able to function properly in
the
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society once they grow up.
Furthermore
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, having all
students
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 wear the exact same clothes can be a form of equality, as not all
students
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 are well able to afford fancy or expensive clothing items. When discussing the other point of view, not needing to follow a certain dress code allows the
students
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 to express their individuality, giving them
the
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a
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 sense of freedom.
Although
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 one might argue that expressing your unique personality can be done in different ways and there is no need to break the dress code,
for instance
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, the way you act, the way you talk, or what hobbies interest you, can be a loud indicator of your unique personality.
To sum up
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, whether wearing a uniform is obligatory or not differs depending on the school. Despite providing the pupils with a sense of freedom, which can be important, my take on the matter supports keeping a dress code, as I believe they teach
students
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 valuable lessons that they will benefit from as they grow older
Submitted by immrali7 on

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task achievement
Consider enhancing your essay with more relevant, specific examples. This will help to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
While your essay is well-structured, try to ensure that each paragraph flows smoothly into the next with the use of transitional phrases.
task achievement
Your essay presents a clear opinion and provides reasons for it, successfully discussing both sides of the argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion effectively frame your argument, providing a strong start and finish to the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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