Environmental issues such as climate change have always been an international problem because governments are not imposing harsh punishments against offenders. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Support your answer with specific reasons and examples.

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Governments
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have been too weak to the environmental criminals these days, resulting in the increase of problems
such
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as climate change. I think the
governments
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should tighten the regulations and the punishments to scare them.
For instance
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, there are many illegal miners that still exist in my
company
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's mine pits. The problem is they practically use the wrong method to extract the resources, with dangerous chemicals
such
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as formalin that need proper measurement.
This
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issue can cause river pollution, which comes from the poisonous waste produced by the illegal miners. As a
company
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, we can only rely on the government to punish them because when it already affects the environment, it becomes the international responsibility.
On the other hand
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, the execution of law enforcement should be
also
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done by us, the society and the
company
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. The
governments
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may just make strict regulations to control them
while
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the people who feel the effect should participate as well. But when the offenders become too wild and brave, the
governments
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should give harsh punishment to make them deterrents. My
company
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have done many actions to make them stop, like giving many compensation, providing them with a living place, and even recruiting them as our employees. But in reality, it does not come as easy as that. In summary, I believe the
governments
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have the biggest influence on fighting environmental problems but as a community, we should
also
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realise and do something to overcome it. Together we can minimize the issues beyond climate change in the future.
Submitted by josepharie31 on

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task achievement
Try to develop your points more thoroughly to provide a more comprehensive response to the prompt.
task achievement
Make sure all your ideas are clearly explained and not assumed to be understood.
coherence cohesion
Improve the logical transitions between ideas to enhance the logical structure of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to highlight the main idea.
task achievement
Specific example of illegal miners impacting the environment strengthens the task response.
coherence cohesion
The essay contains a clear introduction and conclusion, which gives it a good structure.
task achievement
Effort to include both the responsibilities of governments and society enhances the depth of the discussion.

Your opinion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • international problem
  • harsh punishments
  • offenders
  • environmental protection
  • strict regulations
  • emissions
  • lenient policies
  • corporate responsibility
  • fines
  • profits
  • global cooperation
  • international treaties
  • Paris Agreement
  • enforceable penalties
  • compliance
  • public awareness
  • grassroots movements
  • climate strikes
  • policies
  • technological limitations
  • economic barriers
  • developing nations
  • economic dependency
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