You said: It is difficult for many people to create a balance between their professional and their personal life. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?

#people #balance #life

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Many individuals find it hard to differentiate their professional and personal

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. Since humans have an emotional well-being, it is only obvious that sometimes we act

according to

Linking Words

our feelings and ambitions.

Besides

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, people might have responsibilities that they can not just abandon. In my opinion,

this

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problem could be prevented with the policies that companies have. To start with, society these days is very competitive. They have created the concept of toxic productivity. In which, people are sacrificing all of their free

time

Use synonyms

to work with an ambition of being the most successful. As a matter of fact, people are driven too much by their ego and ambitions which lead to them losing track of

time

Use synonyms

Moreover

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, they might be the main provider for their family, and it is reasonable for them to want to present the best.

For instance

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, a father is working all the

time

Use synonyms

, to provide his daughter with a good education.

However

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, there are things that companies could do to prevent these situations. It relies on the policies that they have. As an example, they could provide their employees with a high salary.

Consequently

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, employees would not be underpaid and looking for side jobs.

Furthermore

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, they

also

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could set the right amount of leave days. In my experience, there are employees who constantly get their applications for leave rejected.

Additionally

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, the most important part is for the company to set their strict working hours.

Nevertheless

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, these solutions could only be applicable if the individuals had good

time

Use synonyms

management.

Submitted by iigness05 on Tue Jan 07 2025

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task achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure that each point made in the essay is fully expanded with examples or explanations. For instance, when discussing companies' solutions, elaborate further on how the proposed actions specifically help balance personal and professional life.

coherence cohesion

Maintain paragraph focus by consistently relating back to the main idea or thesis. Transition words can help the reader understand the progression of your argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay begins with a clear introduction and effectively outlines the issue at hand.

task achievement

Both causes and solutions of the problem are addressed, which fulfills the task requirements well.

task achievement

The essay suggests practical solutions, such as company policies, to the problems discussed.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

253 words

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You said: It is difficult for many people to create a balance between their professional and their personal life. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some cities have vehicle-free days when private cars, trucks and motorcylces are banned from city center. People are encouraged to use public transports such as buses, taxis and metro on vehicle-free day. To what extent do you think the advantages of this outweighs the disadvantages?

Some people say history as one of the important school subjects, other people think that today’s world, subjects like science and technology or more in Porten than history discuss both of use and give your opinion.

Space exploration costs tax payers an exorbitant amount of money each year. What are the advantages and disadvantages of spending money on space exploration