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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.

The following table shows the number of people from five European nations living in each other’s countries in 2011.
#people #five #european #nations #other’s #countries
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The table compares the proportion of five nations in Europe, living in one another's
countries
Use synonyms
 throughout 2011.
Overall
Linking Words
, Germany and Britain were the home for the vast majority of immigrants
while
Linking Words
Poland
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 was inhabited by the least percentage of European foreigners. At the same time, the citizens of
Poland
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 showed by far the highest level of dwelling in the neighbourhood
countries
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 compared to the remaining ones. The table shows 3 additional immigrated
countries
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: Italy,
Poland
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 and Spain. Spain was inhabited by above
850 000
Correct your spelling
850,000
 people, the third most populated land after Britain and Germany. Approximately
200 000
Correct your spelling
200,000
 people moved to Italy,
while
Linking Words
 only 6000 lived in
Poland
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. The nations,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, showed a reversal
data
Change preposition
of data
show examples
. Polishes and Italians dwelled
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
 territories more than other nationalities. Above half a million British and German people made other
countries
Use synonyms
 their home. The
least
Correct word choice
lowest
show examples
 percentage was shown by Spanish, above 200 000 emigrants.
Submitted by ansa13 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, poland with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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