Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices oneveryday matters (such as food, clothes and entertainment) is likely to result in asociety of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other peoplebelieve that it is important for children to make decisions about matters thataff ect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #choices #oneveryday #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #asociety #individuals #peoplebelieve #decisions #thataff #ect

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

There are multiple perspectives on how to raise

children

Use synonyms

to make better

decisions

Use synonyms

, as

this

Linking Words

forms the foundation of their education. Some argue that it is more effective to allow

children

Use synonyms

to make their own

decisions

Use synonyms

on daily matters,

while

Linking Words

others believe it is essential for

children

Use synonyms

to have the freedom to make choices regarding issues that directly impact their lives. In my opinion, understanding both views can provide a balanced approach

for

Change preposition

show examples

raising

children

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, allowing

children

Use synonyms

the freedom to make their own

decisions

Use synonyms

should be considered.

This

Linking Words

approach helps

children

Use synonyms

distinguish between right and wrong, fostering a sense of responsibility for their actions.

For example

Linking Words

children

Use synonyms

can observe the positive and negative effects of their choices, enabling them to become wiser and more accountable individuals.

Additionally

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

experience equips them with problem-solving skills and the ability to develop better solutions, not just for themselves but for society as a whole.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, if

children

Use synonyms

make

decisions

Use synonyms

without any guidance or consideration of the consequences, it can lead to

self-centered

Change the spelling

self-centred

show examples

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

This

Linking Words

may result in them prioritizing their own interests over those of others.

Such

Linking Words

attitudes can foster spoiled

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

, where they care only about themselves and may eventually blame others for the poor

decisions

Use synonyms

they make. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

the debate about the best approach to teaching decision-making to the next generation may lead to different outcomes, I believe that incorporating both perspectives and explaining the consequences of each action can be the most effective way to guide

children

Use synonyms

toward balanced and responsible decision-making.

Submitted by kimtatt.tan97 on Thu Jan 16 2025

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

relevant specific examples

Consider providing more specific examples to strengthen your arguments. This can help illustrate your points more clearly and make them more relatable for the reader.

complete response

While your essay does present both views effectively, consider expanding on each perspective a little more to provide a more comprehensive comparison.

logical structure

The essay has a clear and logical structure, with a well-defined introduction and conclusion that effectively summaries the main points.

clear comprehensive ideas

You offer a balanced discussion of both views, which indicates a comprehensive understanding of the topic. This balanced approach is a strong aspect of your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

independence
decision-making skills
self-assuredness
consequences
personal development
resilience
personal responsibility
accountability
moral and ethical development
selfishness
sense of entitlement
social skills
empathy development
structured framework
social responsibility

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
The increasing housing problem in big cities has social consequences. Some people say that only government can solve this problem? To what extent do you agree or disagree?
As a result of modernization, more and more people tend to migrate from rural settlements to cities with the hope of searching for potential job opportunities and a better life. This trend leads to the increasing speed of population density in many metropolitan areas and poses an urgent housing problem in urban areas, which creates severe social repercussions. Some people suppose that only the government can solve these issues, while others argue that they cannot intervene in the free economy. From my perspective, I completely agree that lawmakers can draft laws that can solve this problem.
7
band
In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many difference from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasond? do the adventages outweight disadventages?
By the millennium, people used to travel in order to compare their hometowns with foreign countries. Today they will not be able to do it with the same aim, since monopolies become similar.It is wrong due to the globalization and social networking system. The main disadvantage is that countries are losing their own aesthetic sides at all.
7
band
Nowadays people pay more attention to foods price instead of their process of making. Are you agree or disagree with this argument?
In this modern world, people have lots of options to choose their foods. However, a major section of the population still focuses mainly on food prices whether it is cheaper or expensive, instead of what goes inside it, while choosing foods. Personally, I don't agree with selecting foods based on price and I have the following reasons to support my stance.
6
band
The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today .
The maps demonstrate a park when it was initially constructed in 1920 and how it looks today .
7.5
band
In many countries governments are living in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
Recently, authorities worldwide have been refining new technology to better serve the people. Personally, I think that this is a good use of public funds and that the cause for this move is the rising number of offenders.

Fully explain your ideas

The increasing housing problem in big cities has social consequences. Some people say that only government can solve this problem? To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the past, people used to travel abroad to look for many difference from their home country. Nowadays, cities throughout the world are becoming more and more similar. What are the reasond? do the adventages outweight disadventages?

Nowadays people pay more attention to foods price instead of their process of making. Are you agree or disagree with this argument?

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today .

In many countries governments are living in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?