Some people believe that technology such as mobile phones has destroyed social interaction. Do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays,
technology
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is a hot topic in modern life.
While
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some individuals believe that it is using a
cellphone
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cell phone
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to facilitate effective communication, Others complain about the destruction of social relationships. I firmly support that using
technology
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is not beneficial more than the traditional way. in
this
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essay, I will support my view with examples.
To begin
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with, it is true that technological networks are essential for
people
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to communicate and stay online to acquire news about the world.
Thus
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, if
people
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shared important moments with each other, they might remember them for life.
However
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, there is already a plethora of websites for individuals to
connectwith
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connect with
, but they may feel isolated by the idea of distance relationships.
Additionally
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, they may lose hope in the meeting, leading to deterioration in their psychological state.
For example
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,
although
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Japan provides a lot of programs virtual, the number of suicides
due to
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loneliness continues to rise.
Therefore
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, increasing the promotion of digital sites is not a feasible idea.
On the other hand
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, there is no doubt that traditional social life is more comfortable than technological lifestyles. Because of the development of
technology
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, it is possible for gaps to happen in society.
For instance
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, social media sites create barriers in communities and
people
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do not find an opportunity to express their emotions and problems.
Moreover
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, if some
people
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are willing to improve their real lives, they can always visit their relatives who offer advice on the difficulties they are facing.
In addition
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, there are many social workers with professional experience so getting information about a healthy social lifestyle has become easier than ever before. In conclusion,
although
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there are some benefits to exploiting
technology
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to publish helpful information, I wholeheartedly believe that traditional methods are more useful than anything else. There are numerous ways to accomplish
this
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,
such
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as talking face-to-face with family members and consulting social workers.
Submitted by mariam99aa4 on

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task response
Make sure to clearly state your position on the topic in the introduction and consistently develop it throughout the essay for maximum clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has one clear central idea, which is well-developed with supporting points and examples.
task response
Avoid using slightly ambiguous phrases such as 'exploiting technology'. Instead, use clearer language to convey your ideas more effectively.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction provides a clear overview of the writer's position, making it easy for the reader to understand the stance from the outset.
supported main points
Good use of examples, such as the rising suicide rates in Japan, to support the argument about the detrimental effects of technology on social interaction.
logical structure
The essay flows logically with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, which makes it easy to follow the argument.
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