Some people think that music only benefits individuals and societies. Others, however, think that music can have a negative influence on both. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

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There are two opinions about the effect of

music

Use synonyms

on individuals and societies. Some think that

music

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causes only positive effects,

while

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others suppose that it

also

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has a detrimental impact. Below, I will make out both sides and will propose my point as an example.

To begin

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with, it is evident that the

music

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industry is one of the most successful spheres today, and was born almost a thousand years ago. There are numerous genres all are being listened to quite frequently.

Moreover

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, psychologists use

music

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in their therapies, owing to the significant changes it causes to people’s neuron systems. It is proven that classical

music

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helps to meditate and concentrate your attention on education, or work.

On the other hand

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, listening to

music

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in an extremely emotional state,

such

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as depression or emotional inconsistency, may cause dependence on

such

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a melancholic sense.

Nevertheless

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, society continues to be emotionally affectable by

music

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. Certain individuals can experience changes in their mood under the effect of different genres of melodies, which is not useful in practice.

For instance

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, at important conferences organizers turn on official and mostly motivational ones, to create a comfortable and prepared working environment.

This

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may cause some difficulties in situations in which you do not have

this

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atmosphere.

Overall

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, melodies indeed have their impact on people’s minds and

acception

Correct your spelling

exception

, from my point of view,

music

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also

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can unite different people from different countries,

thus

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I think its drawbacks are negligible in comparison to the advantages it brings.

moon2014angelMon Jan 27 2025

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task achievement

Your essay could benefit from more balanced development of the opposing view. While you provided a solid paragraph on the positive aspects of music, the paragraph discussing its potential negatives is less developed. Consider expanding on this to create better balance.

task achievement

Some of the examples, while relevant, could be integrated more seamlessly into your argument. Try to tie them more directly to the points you're making.

coherence cohesion

Consider refining your transition between ideas for smoother flow. While your essay is generally cohesive, stronger transitional phrases can enhance the connection between your ideas.

introduction conclusion present

Your introduction sets a clear context by outlining both perspectives and indicating your intent to discuss them.

introduction conclusion present

Conclusion is concise and offers a clear opinion, reinforcing your argument.

logical structure

Logical structure is evident, with each paragraph dedicated to a particular side of the argument and a conclusion that summarizes your viewpoint.

relevant specific examples

You provide specific examples, such as the use of music in therapy and international conferences, which supports your main points and makes your argument more convincing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

250 words

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Some people think that music only benefits individuals and societies. Others, however, think that music can have a negative influence on both. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Include an introduction and conclusion

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

In some parts of world , it’s becoming increasingly popular to try to find out the history of their own family, why do you think people do this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some companies have uniforms for their employees which must be worn when they are at work. What are the advantages for a business of having a uniform and are there any advantages of having uniform for their staff?

Some businesses observe that people who just finished college have a hard time interacting with collegues in working as a team.What do you think is the reason behind this? What are your suggestions to address this problem?

Some people believe that young people should choose the jobs that they want, but other people think they should be more realistic and think more about their future. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.