IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Living in a country where you have to speak a foreign language can cause serious social problems, as well as practical problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is thought that living in a foreign
country
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 has many problems
such
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 as social and practical
difficulties
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.
This
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 essay completely agrees with
this
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 statement because living in a foreign
country
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 may lead to social isolation for many and challenges at work or study. Living in a foreign
country
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 may lead to social isolation, especially for individuals who have
difficulties
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 in learning languages.
Language
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 barriers can make it difficult to communicate with
people
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 or even understand other
people
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 which prevents many from engaging in society or making friendships with anyone.
For instance
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, learning a
language
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 requires time, when a person is living in a foreign
country
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, it is going to be difficult for them to communicate with
people
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 and they may face challenges in their learning journey , which makes them shy and hesitate to build friendships with anyone.
Moreover
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, living in a city where everyone speaks a foreign
language
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 can cause problems for employees or students who are not native speakers. Many jobs require fluency in the local
language
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 and without strong
language
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 skills many individuals may face
difficulties
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to improve
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in improving
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 their professional lives.
For example
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,
language
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 skills are crucial for employees in order to get promotions or benefits;
however
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, a lack of these skills will cause
difficulties
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 for many to improve in their career lives. In conclusion, living in a foreign
country
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 may be challenging for many
people
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 and can cause serious social and practical problems, particularly for learners because the learning journey needs time and effort which makes it difficult for many to socialize
due to
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 their weakness in speaking
language
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,
along with
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difficulties
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 to improve employees’ professional lives because some jobs require fluency in
language
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 skill.

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task achievement
Your introduction clearly states your position, which is good. However, consider elaborating slightly more on the points that you plan to discuss in your essay to provide a clearer roadmap for the reader.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure to use clearer linking phrases between sentences and ideas. For example, instead of saying 'Moreover,' you could say 'Furthermore' to introduce your second main point, which would enhance the flow of your essay.
task achievement
In your examples, try to provide more specific instances or details to strengthen your arguments. For example, you could mention specific types of jobs or studies that require language skills to make your points more relatable and impactful.
task achievement
Your essay clearly addresses the prompt and presents a clear opinion, which is essential for this type of task.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of your essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy for the reader to follow your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • linguistic proficiency
  • cross-cultural communication
  • miscommunication
  • social integration
  • linguistic alienation
  • cultural dissonance
  • language acquisition
  • communication breakdown
  • interpreter services
  • language courses
  • bilingualism
  • multilingualism
  • language barrier
  • effective communication
  • cultural assimilation
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