IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Explain some of the ways in which humans are damaging the environment. What can governments do to address these problems? What can individual people do?

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Nowadays, the
environment
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 is deteriorating because human interventions have increased uncontrollably.
Due to
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this
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, numerous environmental issues,
such
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 as
air
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 and
water
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 pollution, are formed. Effective solutions to
this
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 problem would be better regulation of human-caused environmental degradation
as well as
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 increased awareness must be implemented
to
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by
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 the public. There are several factors that contribute to the form of damaging the
environment
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, especially the two major concerns that include the damage, which are
air
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 and
water
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.
To begin
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 with,
vehicles
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 exhaust toxic gases that are rapidly becoming the primary concern for
air
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 pollution, which has negative effects in the long term for the
environment
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.
For example
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, people burn fossil fuels to power their
vehicles
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 for transportation on a daily basis, and the number of
vehicles
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 increases with the release of gases that pollute the
air
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 and result in global warming.
Furthermore
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, humans are spoiling unfiltered used oils on the lands, creating
water
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 pollution. Industrial waste, which
then
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 contaminates not only the drinking
water
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 but
also
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 the living organisms in rivers and seas, is
also
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 affected negatively. Possible solutions to address the issues
to
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are to
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 implement strict regulations for humans
for
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to
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 overcome the unwanted circumstances to protect the natural habitat.
For instance
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, the authorities may impose high penalties on people or businesses that discharge their waste into rivers. Individuals,
on the other hand
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, can avoid using personal
vehicles
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 to commute for shorter distances.
Instead
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, they can walk or ride a bicycle, which is more beneficial for the planet and themselves. In conclusion, environmental harm is widespread nowadays, but restrictions on certain features and education about protecting the
environment
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 might be effective in dealing with
such
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 issues.

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task achievement
While you have addressed the task, expanding on the solutions and providing examples of stricter regulations can strengthen your argument. Additionally, ensure that your examples illustrate not only the problems but also the effectiveness of possible solutions.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence, make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the sentences logically flow from one to the next. Consider using more linking words to guide the reader through your argument more smoothly.
task achievement
You effectively identify major environmental issues and suggest personal actions individuals can take to combat them. The examples provided offer a good insight into the problems discussed.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pollution: contamination, emissions, pollutants, industrial waste
  • Deforestation: habitat loss, biodiversity, urban development, logging
  • Climate Change: greenhouse gases, global warming, fossil fuels, renewable energy
  • Overfishing: unsustainable, fish stocks, marine ecosystems, conservation
  • Waste Production: non-biodegradable, plastics, recycling, waste management systems
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