People succeed because of their hard work; luck has nothing to do with success. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Some
people
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believe that
success
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is solely the result of hard
work
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and determination,
while
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others argue that
luck
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also
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plays a significant role.
This
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essay disagrees with the idea that
luck
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has nothing to do with
success
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.
Although
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consistent
effort
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is crucial, lucky opportunities often help
people
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achieve their goals faster or more easily.
To begin
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with,
luck
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can provide
people
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with opportunities that hard
work
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alone may not offer.
For instance
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, someone might meet an important business investor by chance or receive an unexpected scholarship. These events, which are not the result of planning or
effort
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, can completely change a person's life. Without
this
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kind of
luck
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, even the most hardworking individuals may never reach the same level of
success
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.
Furthermore
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, hard
work
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does not always guarantee
success
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. Many talented and dedicated
people
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work
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for years without achieving their dreams simply because they are not in the right place at the right time.
On the other hand
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, others may achieve great things with less
effort
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because they had the fortune of being born into a wealthy family or having strong social connections.
This
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shows that
success
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is not only about how much
effort
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someone puts in
,
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apply
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but
also
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about the chances they get. In conclusion,
while
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hard
work
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is an essential factor in achieving
success
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,
luck
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also
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plays an important role.
People
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who are lucky enough to receive opportunities or support often have an advantage, even if they are not the most hardworking.
Therefore
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,
success
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is usually the result of both
effort
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and good fortune.

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task achievement
Consider adding more specific examples that illustrate how luck has played a significant role in real-life success stories. This would strengthen the argument and provide clearer context for your points.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your points flow logically from one to the next. While the main ideas are well connected, some transitions could be smoother for a clearer reading experience.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position that agrees with the idea that luck plays a role in success, showcasing a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
The logical structure is strong, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which enhances the overall readability and effectiveness of the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • succeed
  • hard work
  • luck
  • success
  • view
  • opinion
  • essential
  • factor
  • chances
  • temporary
  • advantage
  • sustained
  • combination
  • develop
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • crucial
  • opportunities
  • individuals
  • make the most of
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