IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Immigration has a major impact on the society. What are the main reasons of immigration. To what consequences can it lead.

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People relocating to other
countries
Use synonyms
 has been a common trend more so in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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developing
countries
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.
While
Linking Words
 seeking
for
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apply
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employment and furthering studies tend to be the leading causes of immigration,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society is affected in both positive and negative ways.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, human beings migrate to other
countries
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due to
Linking Words
 unemployment. In developed
countries
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, there are more available jobs than the population.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these nations tend to have lucrative hourly pay rates which
also
Linking Words
 motivates employees’ movement.
For example
Linking Words
, highly skilled professionals like nurses travel to the US, UK and Australia in search of greener pastures.
To
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In
show examples
add
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addition
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, some folks leave their
mother land
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motherland
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 to go study abroad to advance their education via
the
Correct article usage
apply
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sponsorship programs.
For instance
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,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
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 of my classmates have travelled to Finland to pursue
Master’s
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a Master’s
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 Degree in Engineering.
However
Linking Words
, in as much as moving out of one’s country seems exciting and beneficial to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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job seekers and foreign students, the community is impacted undesirably. First of all, brain drain is inevitable.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
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 of the skilled personnel depart the country resulting
to
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in
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 a shortage of workforce especially in the healthcare, engineering and education sectors.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the country
also
Linking Words
 ends up wasting resources utilized in training these people.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the economic landscape deteriorates
due to
Linking Words
 loss of tax revenues eventually affecting the nation’s Gross Domestic Product.
To conclude
Linking Words
, immigration is primarily influenced by
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
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 of employment and education needs among the citizens and despite the pattern being advantageous to many, it
also
Linking Words
 has its
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
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to
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for
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the
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apply
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society.

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task achievement
Add more specific examples or statistics to strengthen your argument about the benefits and drawbacks of immigration.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using linking words or phrases to create smoother transitions between your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Expand your conclusion slightly to summarize the key points discussed in the essay more effectively.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame the discussion.
task achievement
You've provided relevant examples, especially in the context of your classmates studying abroad, which adds credibility to your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Economic migration
  • Asylum seeker
  • Diaspora
  • Expatriate
  • Refugee status
  • Work permit/visa
  • Demographic shift
  • Naturalization
  • Xenophobia
  • Cultural assimilation
  • Multiculturalism
  • Social cohesion
  • Immigration policies
  • Border control
  • Undocumented immigrants
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