IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie chart gives information on UAE government spending in 2000. The total budget was AED 315 billion. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie chart below illustrates the information on how the United Arab Emirates used the money in 2000. The
budget
Use synonyms
 was AED 315
billion
Use synonyms
 in total. There are ten purposes of spending: social security, transportation, health and personal social services, law, education, industry & agriculture, defence, debt interest, housing heritage and environment, and other expenditures.
Overall
Linking Words
, the UAE government spent its
budget
Use synonyms
 on social security with about AED 100
billion
Use synonyms
, which was the highest spending, followed by health care services with about AED 53
billion
Use synonyms
, which ranked second. The
budget
Use synonyms
 was used for education, with around AED 38
billion
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, both debt interest, other expenditures, and defence were nearly, approximately AED 22-23
billion
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 law and order was AED 17
billion
Use synonyms
 of spending. The
last
Linking Words
 three portions were housing the heritage and environments with AED 15
billion
Use synonyms
, crops & employment with AED 13
billion
Use synonyms
, and transportation only AED 9
billion
Use synonyms
, respectively. In conclusion, the major parts of the
budget
Use synonyms
 spending in 2000 went to social security and medical services.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the UAE government spent less than AED 10
billion
Use synonyms
 on transportation.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words budget, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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