IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication has a negative effect on young people's reading and writing skills.Do you agree or disagree?

With the advent of advanced technology, the proliferation of digital devices has significantly transformed the way
people
Use synonyms
 communicate, particularly among the younger generation.
While
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 some argue that
this
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 shift will have an adverse impact on youngsters' reading and writing proficiency, I strongly agree with
this
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 viewpoint. Excessive reliance on technology can limit young
people
Use synonyms
's reading capacity. The feed online with eye-catching headlines, amusing images, and easy-to-understand dialogues is highly addictive and distractive. Youngsters who lack self-discipline prefer to scroll through posts with stereotyped content tailored to their preferences rather than
pore
Wrong verb form
poring
show examples
 over books or articles. The limited time spent on intensive reading will have a negative impact on their comprehension of complex and sophisticated texts.
Besides
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, the convenience and speed of digital communication diminish young
people
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's writing
skills
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.
Instead
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 of writing full sentences, young
people
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 tend to use abbreviations and emojis to express their emotions and meanings, resulting in less practice in essay writing. What is more, with the help of auto-correct systems and artificial intelligence, it is unnecessary to correct their grammar and spelling mistakes and formulate structures by themselves, which will adversely affect their writing
skills
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.
On the other hand
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, digital communication can
also
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 develop young
people
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's literacy capacity. With diverse related and valuable information available as reference, youngsters could form an essay more easily and improve their writing
skills
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.
Also
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, participating in online discussions can foster deeper interpretation and critical thinking, which are essential for reading and writing.
However
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, these benefits tend to be outweighed by the overarching trend of superficial engagement and limited long-form practice, particularly when digital media is used excessively. In conclusion,
while
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 digital communication offers some potential advantages for the development of young
people
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's literacy, excessive dependence on it is likely to impede both reading and writing
skills
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, primarily by reducing intensive reading opportunities and discouraging learning sentence construction.

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task achievement
Consider incorporating more specific examples or case studies to strengthen your arguments and illustrate your points more effectively.
task achievement
Ensure that all your main points are well-developed and supported with evidence or clear explanations.
coherence and cohesion
While your ideas flow logically, varying your sentence structure and using linking words more frequently could enhance coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Make explicit connections between your ideas in the conclusion to reinforce the argument and summarize the discussion more powerfully.
coherence and cohesion
Strong introduction that clearly states your viewpoint on the issue as well as the purpose of your essay.
task achievement
Clear distinction between the negative impacts and the potential benefits of digital communication, showing a nuanced understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • over-reliance
  • comprehension skills
  • digital content
  • sustained reading capabilities
  • texting and messaging apps
  • abbreviations
  • acronyms
  • emojis
  • formally and coherently
  • educational resources
  • scholarly articles
  • educational apps
  • enhance
  • digital platforms
  • blogs
  • social media posts
  • online forums
  • concise
  • impactful writing
What to do next:
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