Some people think young people should be required to have full time education until they are at least 18 years old. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Several individuals believe that teenagers and children have to
study
Use synonyms
with regular
study
Use synonyms
hours from the first
study
Use synonyms
phase to 18 or more
years
Use synonyms
old. From my perspective, I slightly disagree with
this
Linking Words
notion because some humans have to work from 16,
while
Linking Words
others may need their time to develop personal aspects.
Besides
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
concept undoubtedly teaches youngsters commitment through waking up daily at the same time and doing the same tasks regularly.
In contrast
Linking Words
, it might be a deterrent that faces people who intend to start their career early, and
this
Linking Words
is not wrong, just depends on
circumstances
Correct article usage
the circumstances
show examples
of each one .
Furthermore
Linking Words
, humans usually need
this
Linking Words
routine until 14-15
years
Use synonyms
old to benefit, after that, they can go to school for fewer days or hours.
In addition
Linking Words
, there are many studies that say that people after 16 who
study
Use synonyms
part-time are more flexible than those who
study
Use synonyms
full-time.
Also
Linking Words
, they have more expanding minds
consequently
Linking Words
, they might get better opportunities in the future.
For instance
Linking Words
, if we have two adults 20
years
Use synonyms
old, the first one studied part-time
whereas
Linking Words
the second studied part-time, mostly the first's mind would be less aware than the other. Ultimately, the given idea is useful but I see it is enough until 16
years
Use synonyms
after that everyone should have a discussion if they want to pursue their education in the same style or not. So that education does not shape a problem in students' lives. For these reasons, I cannot completely agree so I suggested some alternative solutions in the previous paragraphs.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea that is fully developed and supported with detailed examples or explanations.
coherence and cohesion
Work on the organization of your ideas. Make sure each paragraph flows logically to the next, connecting the ideas more clearly to help the reader follow your argument.
task achievement
You presented a clear opinion on the topic, which is essential for the task.
task achievement
Your use of examples, such as the comparison between part-time and full-time study, adds depth to your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental cornerstone
  • literacy and numeracy
  • social inequalities
  • foundation of knowledge
  • social mobility
  • informed and engaged citizenry
  • democratic processes
  • youth crime rates
  • productive activities
  • vocational training
  • workforce
  • stifling individual talent
  • economic contribution
  • stress and mental health issues
  • unsuitable educational system
  • one-size-fits-all approach
  • diverse talents
  • career paths
  • formal academic education
  • financial strains
  • low-income countries
  • improving quality of education
What to do next:
Look at other essays: