Some people say that the bicycles are a good, modern means of transportation. Other say riding a bicycle has clear disadvantages.

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In our modern world, environmentally friendly types of
transportation
are becoming more popular on a daily basis.
While
many think bicycles are possibly the best option for
transportation
, others are of the opinion that there are some disadvantages
in
Change preposition
to
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using
bikes
as a transport vehicle. Both views will be discussed, and it will be explored why I believe that moving to bicycles from vehicles
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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powered by fossil fuels is the first step to a green life. There are a large number of beneficial properties, especially in going to work or study by bike.
Firstly
, a bike is a cost-effective way to travel since cars require fossil fuels or electricity, and people can avoid buying
highly priced
Add a hyphen
highly-priced
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cars
as well as
daily or monthly transport fares by purchasing a bike only once.
Furthermore
,
bikes
are highly beneficial for the environment since they do not produce CO2 emissions. Cycling
also
involves physical activity that can be highly beneficial for our cardioprotective system,
this
kind of combination is uncommon in our modern world.
On the other hand
,
bikes
have numerous drawbacks.
Initially
, it is considered a waste of time
due to
its slower speed, which many businessmen dislike since they prefer not to spend their time on the way.
Additionally
, in our modern world, there are a variety of eco-friendly vehicles that are better and faster types of
transportation
than
bikes
.
Moreover
, special cycling paths should be created for cyclists;
however
,
this
requires a large amount of expense. In conclusion, despite some guess
Add a comma
,
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we should
potential
Change the word
potentially
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faster
transportation
type
i
Change the capitalization
I
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suggest that cycling is the best solution to tackle modern eco-problems because even electricity is produced by burning fossil fuels or radioactive materials which are used for charging electric cars. 291 words
Submitted by makemoneyizzy16 on

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task achievement
To improve clarity and comprehensiveness, try to structure your arguments more clearly and concisely. For instance, breaking down complex sentences into simpler ones can help convey your points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to review your essay for minor grammatical and typographical errors, as these can sometimes distract from your main arguments. For example, phrases like 'cars which powered by fossil fuels' should be corrected to 'cars powered by fossil fuels.'
task achievement
The essay covers both views comprehensively and provides a balanced argument, which contributes to a complete response to the task.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-presented, helping the reader to follow the argument from start to finish.
task achievement
Relevant examples and reasons are provided to support the main points, which enhances the overall argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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