With the increased global demand for oil and gas, undiscovered areas of the world should be opened up to access more resources. To what extent do you agree?

Some argued that untouched space should be investigated to fulfil the growing demand for fossil fuels.
Although
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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oil and gas mining could help to meet the need, it
also
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causes a detrimental impact on the environment. I completely disagree with
this
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statement for several reasons, which are explained
further
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with suitable explanations and examples. First and foremost, environmental damage is a major concern. To explain it, many fields are sensitive,
such
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as the Arctic, rainforests, and deep-sea environments. The process of investigating these operations could lead to irreversible damage, like oil spills, habitat destruction, and loss of biodiversity.
Additionally
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, it is
also
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a violation of human rights. theses undiscovered places are home to someone who
depends
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depend
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on them for survival and culture. Resource drilling can displace them and pollute the air, soil, and water.
For instance
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, a survey conducted in Japan revealed that over 90% of environmental pollution is caused by the demand for fossil fuels, leading to issues
such
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as deforestation and the release of toxic gases into the air. Moving
further
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, dependency on non-renewable energy sources goes against combating global warming. The world has already faced the effects of global warming, including rising sea levels, melting glaciers, and extreme weather. By continuing the use of these resources, people contribute to making
this
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condition hazardous.
Next,
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the extraction process requires a huge amount of money, and it may cause health problems
such
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as asthma, lung disease, and dirty drinking water for nearby communities.
For example
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, the research conducted by a neighbouring university had data that more than 70% of the increment can be witnessed after the introduction of hydrocarbon fuels. In conclusion, opening undiscovered areas for oil and gas removal is not a wise solution to meet energy demands. It harms the environment, risks human health, and delays our shift to cleaner, renewable energy.
Instead
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of focusing on short-term gains, we should invest in sustainable alternatives that protect the planet and ensure a better future for the next generation.

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task achievement
The arguments presented are relevant and support the overall stance clearly. However, ensure that each point is fully developed with sufficient reasoning and examples to enhance clarity.
coherence and cohesion
Consider using more varied cohesive devices and linking phrases to improve the flow of ideas. This could help transition between points more smoothly.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear position on the topic and effectively outlines the reasons for disagreement with the statement.
coherence and cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • global demand
  • finite resources
  • energy consumption
  • exploiting
  • untouched ecosystems
  • carbon emissions
  • climate change
  • renewable energy
  • sustainable energy solutions
  • geopolitical consequences
  • territorial disputes
  • dependency
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