Some parents think computer games are better for children and they should be allowed to play more of them. whereas some parents argue that they are harmful to children.Do you think advantages outweight disadvantages.

It has been observed that

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apply

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playing

games

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for

kids

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is very important though it refreshes their minds.

Although

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there are a myriad of benefits

as well as

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drawbacks, few parents believe that online

games

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are fine for infants and they should allowed to play more of them.

However

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, others think that they are dangerous for them. Both the pros and cons will be discussed in future paragraphs.

To begin

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with, today's generation is more inclined towards video

games

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rather than playing outside

due to

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lots of verities in the market and playing

games

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on screen or online is

also

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helping children to make friends from all over the world. To explain, playing online on the

computer

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is beneficial for

kids

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as they are interacting with other people in different parts of the world. Which helps them to learn new cultures and languages.

For example

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, a survey conducted in the UK that, around 45 per cent of school

kids

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are able to speak two different languages through online

games

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Thus

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, their family are encouraging them to play

computer

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games

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to learn more new things.

On the other hand

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, others argue that it is harmful to them and

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leads to health problems

such

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as weak eyesight and mental illness.

For instance

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, a report published in the year 2024 by BBC that more than 38 per cent of individuals have eye issues and mental illness

due to

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playing

games

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on computers.

Hence

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, their families are against that because their children are not involved in physical activities.

To conclude

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although

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, playing

games

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on the

computer

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is harmful to children ,

however

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, online

games

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are opening a new way of learning for

kids

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. In my opinion, playing

games

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on the

computer

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can be more helpful for youngsters.

akhawar3Sun May 18 2025

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task achievement

Expand on your points to provide more depth and ensure that each argument is fully developed. For instance, discussing specific games or types of interactions could strengthen your argument about the positive aspects of gaming.

coherence and cohesion

Pay attention to grammar and phrasing to improve clarity. For example, instead of 'they should allowed,' it should be 'they should be allowed.'

coherence and cohesion

Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay. Instead of repeating phrases like 'harmful,' try synonyms like 'detrimental' or 'adverse effects.'

task achievement

You introduced the topic well and provided a clear overview of both sides of the argument.

task achievement

The examples provided, such as the survey in the UK, were relevant and added credibility to your argument.

coherence and cohesion

The organization of your essay is logical, making it easy to follow your main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

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Some parents think computer games are better for children and they should be allowed to play more of them. whereas some parents argue that they are harmful to children.Do you think advantages outweight disadvantages.

Your opinion

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had the main negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?

Many countries spend a lot of money in art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both arguments and give your opinion

It is the job of governments and companies to deal with the huge environmental problems which we face. Individuals on their own can do little or nothing’. What is your opinion about this statement?