The internet has greatly influenced the way people communicate and interact with each other. Some believe it has a negative impact on personal relationships. agree or disagree?

The
internet
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has significantly changed how
people
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communicate and interact in today's society. Some individuals argue that it ruins personal
relationships
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, I strongly
disgree
Correct your spelling
disagree
with
this
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view because I believe the
internet
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helps improve communication and allows
people
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to have
relationships
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.
To begin
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, the
internet
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makes communication faster and more convenient.
People
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can stay in touch with
friends
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and family no matter where they live, as long as they have an
internet
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connection.
This
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is important for those in long-distance
relationships
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or families who live in different cities or countries.
For example
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, a student studying abroad can still talk with their parents every day through video calls, which helps them to maintain a close bond even though they are far away.
Moreover
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, the
internet
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enables
people
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to make new connections and maintain the old ones. The
Internet
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through many social media platforms allows individuals to meet others with similar interests by joining online communities. Other than that, they
also
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can maintain their existing
relationships
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with those connected on the same social media platforms.
This
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allows
people
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to stay updated on their
friends
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's lives through posts.
For instance
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, many
people
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have met their best
friends
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or partners through online media,
such
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as Instagram, Facebook, and other online forums. In conclusion,
although
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some
people
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think the
internet
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has negative effects on personal
relationships
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, I firmly believe it actually strengthens them. It helps
people
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to communicate easily and build strong connections with new and old
friends
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.

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task achievement
Expand your ideas and provide more examples to strengthen your points. This will make your argument more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words to connect your ideas better and help the flow of your essay. This will improve readability.
task achievement
Your introduction is clear and states your opinion directly, which is great for setting the tone.
task achievement
You've included good examples that support your main ideas, making your argument stronger.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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