IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own pourer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

In my
opinion
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opinion,
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 The migration of skilled
professionals
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 from poorer
countries
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 to developed nations has become a significant global trend.
While
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this
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 movement offers individuals better opportunities, it
also
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 creates several serious problems for the
countries
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 they leave behind. One major issue is the loss of essential services in the home
countries
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.
For example
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, when doctors and nurses leave, already fragile healthcare systems become even weaker, putting public health at risk.
Similarly
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, when experienced teachers emigrate, the quality of education deteriorates, affecting the future workforce and development of the nation.
This
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 "brain drain" contributes to a vicious cycle where poor
countries
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 struggle to develop because they lack the human capital needed to improve key sectors. Another problem is the economic impact. Governments in poorer
countries
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 often invest heavily in the training and education of these
professionals
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, only to lose them to richer
countries
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 without any return on that investment.
This
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 not only wastes resources but
also
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 increases dependency on foreign aid and foreign
professionals
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, which can undermine national sovereignty and confidence. To address
this
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 issue, several measures can be taken.
Firstly
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, governments in poorer
countries
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 must improve working conditions, salaries, and career development opportunities to retain skilled workers. Ensuring better infrastructure, job security, and respect for
professionals
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 can motivate them to stay.
Secondly
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, developed
countries
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 could offer support through ethical recruitment policies, ensuring they do not aggressively hire from
countries
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 facing critical shortages. International agreements and partnerships could help manage
this
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 flow more fairly.
Additionally
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, programs that encourage temporary migration—allowing
professionals
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 to work abroad for a period before returning—can benefit both individuals and home
countries
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. These programs could include incentives like grants, tax breaks, or promotions for those who return with international experience. In conclusion,
while
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 the migration of
professionals
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 is understandable, it causes significant harm to poorer
countries
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. Through better local incentives and fair international cooperation,
this
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 trend can be managed to reduce negative impacts and support sustainable development for all nations involved.

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task achievement
Try to include more specific examples or data to support your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has one clear main idea and that the ideas flow logically from one to another.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to connect your ideas, making it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps guide the reader through your ideas.
task achievement
You have clearly identified the key problems and solutions related to the issue of migration of professionals.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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