Nowadays, an increasing number of people with health problems are using alternative medicine and treatments instead of visiting their normal doctors. Do you think is a positive or negative development due¿

In recent times , it has been much more common for people with health issues are choose natural remedies and therapies rather than going to the doctor. What do think you is it a good or bad improvement¿ I believe,
this
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is a negative development because they are risking their lives. In
this
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essay
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essay,
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I will look at
this
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topic in detail and support my point of view. One main cause that supports my point is that the people who rely on natural remedies which do not have any scientific proof, in terms of that they will just lose time and the condition could get worse .
This
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is because it not only might not be effective but
also
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could cause severe side effects.
For instance
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, for people who suffer from cancer if they just rely on natural resources the tumour will grow bigger and bigger which will be hard to control
it
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apply
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. Another reason why it is a negative development is
due to
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the
versus
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remedies in the media and influencers that fake their identity they say they are doctors and make money by creating a brand that sells
harbels
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herbals
barbels
and natural products, so that would create an issue
instead
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of addressing it . A good example
,
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is that there was a
women
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woman
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who had a serious health problem but the fake doctor was giving her a lot of products and medicines which she did not need and fortunately she died because she took too many things if they were to gather it would be poussin. In conclusion, having looked at the topic in detail,
it is clear that
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the increased use of alternative medicine and treatments should be considered as a negative development
due to
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the risk to community lives.

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task response
Make your introduction clearer and correct any mistakes to improve understanding.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your ideas flow logically from one to another, and use linking words to connect sentences better.
task response
Provide more clear examples and ensure they fully support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Use accurate grammar to avoid confusion. For example, 'the people who rely on...' instead of 'the people who rely on which do not have...'.
task achievement
You clearly express your opinion that this is a negative development.
task achievement
You use some relevant examples to support your points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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