IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think spending money on art is a waste, while others believe it is important to spend money on art. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, there is a debate about whether spending
cash
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 on
art
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 is a waste or a valuable investment. Some
people
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 believe that
cash
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 should be spent on other important areas,
while
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 others think
art
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 is essential for society. In my opinion, I believe that spending
cash
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 on
art
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 is important because it makes places more beautiful and meaningful. On the one hand, some
people
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 argue that spending capital on
art
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 is a waste. They believe that governments should focus on more urgent needs
such
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 as education, healthcare, and building infrastructure.
For example
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, in poor areas,
people
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 may need better schools and hospitals rather than spending
cash
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 on statues or paintings.
On the other hand
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, many
people
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, including myself, believe that
art
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 plays an important role in our lives.
Art
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 makes cities more attractive, expresses culture, and brings joy to
people
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’s lives. Imagine a city without colours, statues, or beautiful buildings — it would look boring and lifeless.
Therefore
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, investing in
art
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 improves the quality of life. In conclusion,
while
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 some
people
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 think that spending
cash
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 on
art
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 is unnecessary, I believe that
art
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 makes our cities more beautiful and reflects the identity of the place. It is not a waste but a way to make life more enjoyable.

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task achievement
Make sure to have clear examples to support your points.
coherence and cohesion
Try to use linking words (like 'firstly', 'moreover') to connect your ideas better.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
task achievement
You express your opinion clearly in your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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