New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In our rapidly evolving world, technological advancements are significantly reshaping how young people spend their free time.
This
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pervasive influence undeniably presents both advantages and disadvantages in
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teenagers' recreational activities.
This
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essay will highlight the notable benefits and delve into the drawbacks of
this
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phenomenon.
To begin
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with, a primary benefit of technological devices for children is their immense contribution to education. Young individuals can now instantly access a vast array of knowledge from diverse academic fields through a palm-sized smartphone with internet connectivity.
As a result
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, educational institutions increasingly integrate both in-person and online classes to maximize the effectiveness of their informative courses. A clear example of
this
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was during the COVID-19 pandemic, when colleges and schools drastically shifted to virtual classes, successfully maintaining the continuity of learning and academic progress.
On the other hand
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, the detrimental aspects of modern technology profoundly affect the mental and physical well-being of adolescents, posing a significant challenge not only for families but
also
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for developing and developed nations alike. Despite the undeniable upsides of innovative technology, many young people become addicted to various entertainment platforms like TikTok or online gaming, leading to excessive screen time.
Consequently
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, younger individuals may suffer from issues
such
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as brain fatigue, weakened immune systems, and
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health concerns. In extreme cases, some children have even resorted to self-harm or threatened relatives when adults strictly prohibit them from using modern devices. In conclusion, technological innovations offer the world a wide range of high-level utilities.
Nevertheless
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, it is crucial for society to constantly remember their drawbacks, which can lead to the gradual decline of mental and physical well-being, particularly for future generations.

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coherence and cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, but make sure your body paragraphs stay focused on one main point each.
task achievement
Try to add more specific examples to strengthen your main points, as this will enhance your argument.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that your ideas flow smoothly from one to another. Use linking words to connect your thoughts better.
strength
Your introduction sets the stage well for the discussion on technology's impact.
strength
Good use of examples, especially the mention of the COVID-19 pandemic, to illustrate your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • new technologies
  • children
  • free time
  • access
  • educational resources
  • information
  • development
  • key skills
  • enhancing
  • creativity
  • imagination
  • opportunity
  • connect
  • convenience
  • flexibility
  • lack
  • physical activity
  • potential
  • health issues
  • impact
  • social
  • emotional development
  • exposure
  • inappropriate content
  • addiction
  • dependency
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