IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The plans show the ground floor of the library in 2001 and how it was redeveloped in 2009.

The plans show the layout of the ground floor of a library in 2001 and the changes made to it by 2009.
Overall
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, the library was significantly modernised and redesigned to offer more multimedia services and dedicated areas for specific user groups,
such
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 as children. In 2001, the layout was simple and primarily focused on books. In the entrance , starting from the Librarian’s desk , which was on the south part, and close to the entrance, there were stairs , and by providing in the central area, there were four rows of tables for reading, surrounded by book sections. From the point on the right side, there were librarian’s platforms
such
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 as newspapers and periodicals, and on the other side of the ground floor were Fiction books , Self-help and History. By 2009, notable changes had taken place. The children’s area and a new collection of children’s books replaced the self-help and Newspaper sections on the right side.
Additionally
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, a lounge area and kitchen were introduced in the bottom right corner. The fiction section was relocated to the top left, where a new multimedia sector for films and DVDs was
also
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 added. Computers were installed where tables used to be, and
although
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 fewer tables remained, they were reorganised in a more compact layout. The history section and the librarian’s desk remained unchanged.

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task achievement
Try to clearly define the main features of the library changes in your introduction.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and flows logically from one to the next.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to support your main points, especially about the changes.
task achievement
The overall summary of the library's changes is clear and well-stated.
coherence and cohesion
The time progression from 2001 to 2009 is well organized.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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