In some place, old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#place #age #cultures #youth

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Even recently, the old discussion of ageism is still a hot issue talked about by the people.

While

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many individuals stand with the importance of the old citizens, there are

also

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many folks from different backgrounds that hold the youth in a higher position. In

this

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essay, I shall discuss points from both views before sharing my opinion about

this

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matter. On one hand, the old generation is one of the main sources of information and knowledge. They are essential for the community because of their wisdom and long life experiences. The same quality is

also

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the reason why individuals in old age are generally more suitable to fill the leadership role, in the hope of better judgements and decision-making capability.

This

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statement is supported by the age restrictions implemented in many countries in presidential election rule.

On the other hand

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, the said group

also

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has their own problems. They don't have the same level of energy and movement as the youth, causing the latter group to be suitable for execution or a productive role in the community.

In addition

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to that, the fact that younger people have longer years ahead of them is

also

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essential for any exciting innovations that bring a better quality of life and improvements for humankind's future.

However

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, inexperienced individuals, are still in need of guidance from experienced ones to not repeat the same mistakes made before. The importance of youth is supported by the implementation of prioritization in saving children in any emergency situation.

To conclude

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while

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both groups have their own strength and weaknesses it is important for them to collaborate together to achieve the same goal of the sustainability of our species. I personally argue that age is just a number because currently, with the advancement of our technology, even younger people can gain access to life experiences faster than ever.

Submitted by gurunnevada on Tue Jan 23 2024

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coherence cohesion

To improve the logical structure, ensure that transitions between paragraphs are smooth and that ideas follow a logical progression. Using a wider range of linking words would enhance the flow of information.

coherence cohesion

Maintain a clear introduction and conclusion. Although you provided both, they could be strengthened by more explicitly stating the essay's thesis in the introduction and summarizing the main points alongside your opinion in the conclusion.

coherence cohesion

Support your main points with specific examples. Work on integrating more detailed instances or case studies that illustrate your arguments. Examples add depth and credibility to your essay.

task achievement

Address the task's prompts fully. While you have discussed both views and given your opinion, there is room to present a more nuanced analysis and a wider range of arguments for each perspective.

task achievement

To enhance the clarity of ideas, structure your essay so each paragraph focuses on one main idea. This helps the examiner follow your thought process and reinforces the clarity of your argument.

task achievement

Incorporate examples that are specific and directly relevant to the prompt. Using more precise examples related to ageism and the roles of youth and the elderly in society would strengthen your argument and task response.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

309 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

wisdom
respected
accumulated
heritage
patriarchs
matriarchs
innovation
adaptability
trends
dynamic
heritage
progress
continuity
traditions
harmonious

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In some place, old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Young people are leaving their homes in rural areas to work or study in cities. What are the reasons? Do the advantages of this development outweigh the drawbacks?

The rate of unemployment in some countries is high. Because of this, there is no need to complete an education beyond a primary school level. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many feel that the common educational system of teachers and students in a classroom will be replaced by the year 2050. Do you agree with this view? Give your opinion.