Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do advantages of this trend outweigh disadvantages?
It has been pointed out that an increasing number of individuals decide to have their first kid in their late thirties or forties. Personally, I opine that the stiff competitive atmosphere in our society causes
this
circumstance, and this
disgraceful trend is detrimental to the development of our country from different aspects.
First of all, the strong competition in the job market is the reason for young individuals making the decision to have their babies later in their lives. This
is because in order to keep their well-paid jobs and make more money to support their livelihood, young individuals are always required to work beyond the predetermined hours, which squizzed their leisure time, thus
leading to that they do not have enough time to think about having their children. For instance
, a huge percentage of young couples who are working in well-known companies in Hong Kong said that it is quite common for them to work until late mid-night every weekday, which genuinely makes up a great deal of their spare time to consider having their babies and take care of them. As a result
of this
, they have decided to have their first kid after their forty years old.
Furthermore
, this
dreadful situation has affected the development of our nations. The reason is that professionals and experts, especially young graduates who have achieved amazing academic performance in educational establishments, in various fields are the main contributors to the growth of a country. If ordinary people delay in
having their children, it will lead to Change preposition
apply
the
lack of human resources, Correct article usage
a
thus
harming the development of our country. As an illustration, a specialist of an institution of biology points out that due to
a lack of young outstanding talents whose major is pharmacy, they are facing a profound challenge to carry out new experiments and produce new medicines, which hinders the advancement of biology in their nation.
In conclusion, although
people may vary in their opinion about the cause and effect of the delay in having children of young generations, I am of the opinion that the fierce competition in workplaces is the reason for this
situation, and it has resulted in several drawbacks for the growth of a nation in various industriesSubmitted by strawberry.guan on
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Task Response
Introduce both sides of the argument in your introduction to give a clear overview of your stance on the advantages and disadvantages.
Task Response
Make sure to explicitly discuss both the advantages and disadvantages to fully address all parts of the question.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on varying your sentence structures and using linking words to improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider organizing your paragraphs more clearly around main ideas with relevant examples and explanations to support each point.
Task Response
You provided a clear opinion and conclusion, which helps in making your position known throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
You used specific examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your essay.
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