Some ex-prisoners commit crimes after being released from the prison. What do you think is the cause? How can it be solved?

The issue of ex-
prisoners
Use synonyms
reoffending has become a significant issue in both developed and developing countries.
This
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essay will demonstrate the reasons why
prisoners
Use synonyms
commit crimes again, including
while
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imposing practical solutions for both
governments
Use synonyms
and educational departments to tackle. One major reason for
this
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trend is that
exprisoners
Correct your spelling
prisoners
cannot find suitable jobs with a compatible salary which allows them to raise their children, communicate with friends or support their families, especially the lack of stable income.
In addition
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, many ex-
prisoners
Use synonyms
have criminal records in the national police department
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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the discrimination by employers
forcing
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forces
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them to reoffend what they previously did. To address the issue that people are reoffending again,
governments
Use synonyms
can help the people being released from prison by allocating them to industries,
support
Wrong verb form
supporting
show examples
them with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sufficient skills which enable them to be involved in the job market. Specifically,
governments
Use synonyms
can
also
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enact and implement protocols to help
prisoners
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to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
reduce taxes or fit
in
Change preposition
into
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a tax-free company, as they need more care than others. For educational departments, schools should conduct more educational events or excursions
like
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, like
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barbecue enables them to get involved within the communities and give them detailed information about the drawbacks when committing a crime. If
prisoners
Use synonyms
can weigh the benefits against
risks
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risks,
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especially when the risks are extremely high,
for instance
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, people are getting a 5000 fine check by smoking in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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public,
therefore
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they would not take risks to
smoking
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smoke
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in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
sector
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apply
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. In conclusion, both
governments
Use synonyms
and educational departments should supervise
prisoners
Use synonyms
when they are in prison,
while
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the amount of education for
exprisoners
Correct your spelling
prisoners
should not be overlooked.

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task achievement
You clearly stated the problem and introduced solutions, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, showing structure.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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