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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some people think that a good diet and exercise are not necessary to live a long and healthy life. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that an advantageous eating regimen and physical activity are not essential to achieve a long lifespan with good
health
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay strongly disagrees with
this
Linking Words
 statement because a beneficial regimen and fitness routine will help the body fight against chronic diseases, and it will improve mental
health
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 as well. If
people
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 want to live as long as possible, they should have a top-notch nutritional plan and drill because it will prevent long-term diseases from reaching the body. Eating healthy food and working out will provide a huge amount of vitamins, minerals and proteins, which will strengthen the body.
Therefore
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, blood circulation will be activated, and all internal organs will be strengthened without exception, and
this
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 will extend the life span of the person.
For example
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, the WHO has recently reported that 74% of athletes die without any illnesses.
In contrast
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, 70% of
people
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 who do not really care about being fit die because of a serious disease. Another reason why being athletic is necessary for a longer life is its effects on
overall
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 psychological
health
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. Have you noticed that healthy
people
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 tend to be in a good mood?
This
Linking Words
 is mainly because of what they consume in their everyday life. They consume products that are filled with omega-3, which is a vitamin that maintains brain
health
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.
Consequently
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 will mitigate their aggressive behaviour and make them emotionally stable.
For instance
Linking Words
, in a 2023 study at Harvard University, they found that
people
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 who exercise regularly are less likely to face suicidal thoughts by 25% compared to non-athletic
people
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. In conclusion, maintaining a healthy lifestyle is essential for longevity, as it prevents many diseases and supports excellent mental well-being throughout the day.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe that everyone should adopt a balanced diet and a consistent exercise routine.

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content
Use real and true facts. Do not claim things like 'WHO says' or 'Harvard shows' unless you can reference a real source. Either give a general, strong idea with no numbers, or use safe, general examples.
structure
Give your ideas one by one in each paragraph. Start with a clear topic sentence. Then explain and show why it is true.
structure
Keep link words simple and clear to show how ideas go from one to next.
language
Fix word use. 'Omega-3 is not a vitamin' and 'drill' may be wrong for exercise. Use simple and correct words.
language
Mind your grammar and spell. Short, straight sentences can help.
structure
Clear view in the introduction and in the conclusion, so the reader sees your aim.
coherence
You use 'another reason' and 'for example' to show ideas.
language
The writing shows a good attempt to link causes and effects.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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