IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

With the advancement in technology, the traditional skills and way of life are dying out. In this era of development, it is pointless to try and keep them alive. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As technology develops, nothing remains untouched. Our lifestyle is no exception.
While
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 some argue that thanks to the technological revolution, the traditional ways of living are a thing of the past, in my view, traditional skills are what our lives are all about. On the one hand, time goes a long
way
Use synonyms
 in
this
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 modern life. To clarify, thanks to urban life, everybody has to work from dawn to dusk to meet their daily demands.
In other words
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, they have to work for long hours.
As a result
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, when they get back home, they are so tired that they cannot stay in a vertical position, let alone do their household chores. In
this
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way
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, they tend to use some modern tools to save time on doing household chores.
For example
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, they use a smart oven to cook their food as soon as possible to quench their thirst of hunger.
On the other hand
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, there is a definite link between cooking and preserving culture. In fact, traditional food symbolises the
way
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 of cooking that our ancestors used to use it to meet their basic needs. If we eliminate
this
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 traditional recipe, we eliminate a part of our culture and tradition.
Moreover
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, cooking traditionally provides the chance for family members to get together to spend quality time at mealtimes, which can be really beneficial to relieve their stress and anxiety that they experience
due to
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 the pace of urban life.
Hence
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, the traditional
way
Use synonyms
 of living is too important to be overlooked. In conclusion,
although
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 modern technology can make our lives much easier compared to the past, it is not as if we should sacrifice our culture and tradition for the sake of being comfortable in the modern era. I strongly believe modern tools and gadgets can not replace their traditional counterparts.

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task response
Make your main idea clear from the first line and keep it in every paragraph.
coherence
Use one main point per paragraph and end with a link to the next idea.
content
Give strong examples for each point; add more detail and tie back to your view.
strength
Clear view on the topic and stance.
structure
Use of signposts like 'On the one hand' and 'In conclusion'.
content
Comment on how culture and life fit together.
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