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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people say that tourists cannot learn very much about a place from visiting it on holiday. Others say that they can learn a lot. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Opinions differ regarding whether
tourists
Use synonyms
 can truly learn much about a place during a holiday trip. In my view, travelling is one of the most effective ways to gain knowledge about a destination, as it enables people to experience local cultures directly. As the saying goes, “Travelling thousands of miles is better than reading thousands of books.” By immersing themselves in local customs and traditions,
tourists
Use synonyms
 can acquire insights that go far beyond what textbooks provide.
Moreover
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, many tourist attractions now offer guided tours, allowing visitors to learn
while
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 enjoying the journey.
For example
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, recent surveys indicate that more parents are taking their children on educational trips during holidays, aiming to broaden their horizons and expose them to knowledge outside the classroom.
On the other hand
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, some argue that travelling does not necessarily lead to meaningful learning, largely
due to
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 tight schedules. Holidays are often short, especially for employees, and itineraries arranged by travel agencies tend to be packed with multiple destinations in a single day.
As a result
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,
tourists
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 may only have time to take photos rather than engage deeply with the local environment.
For instance
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, package tours often
prioritize
Change the spelling
prioritise
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 efficiency over cultural immersion, leaving participants with only superficial impressions.
Therefore
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, a more relaxed schedule that allows extended time at each site would be a better approach for those who wish to learn more. In conclusion,
while
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 rushed holidays may limit opportunities for genuine learning, I believe that travelling—when undertaken thoughtfully—offers unique cultural experiences that cannot be found in books. Ultimately, the depth of learning depends not only on the act of travelling itself but
also
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 on how much time and effort
tourists
Use synonyms
 devote to engaging with the local culture.

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task-approach
Plan your answer first. State the view in the intro, show both sides in body, then give your own clear line in the conclusion.
content-development
Keep ideas close to the task. Say how travel can help learning, and how it can fail, with simple facts.
language
Use short, simple words and short sentences. Avoid hard words.
coherence
Use linking words to show how ideas connect, like and, but, also, therefore.
conclusion
End with a clear own view and a short reason.
strength
The essay shows a clear view and a call to action.
structure
It has a clear start, body, and end and uses good sign posts.
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