some people think that books should be stopped in schools and that videos, films, and computers should be used instead. To what extent do you agree?

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Some
indivuals
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individuals
believe that paper
books
Use synonyms
must be stopped in education and
increase
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increasing
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online
web sites
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websites
and computer activities is
realy
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really
worth of future
and
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, and
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
believe that its waste of time and money.
However
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, I
storngly
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strongly
believe that its ture and worth. So
in
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, in
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this
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essay
Add a comma
essay,
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we will discuss why I completely agree with
this
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statement.
Firstly
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, there are many advantages and disadvantages
on
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to
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this
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arguement
such
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as it is easy to learn and easy to manage and
also
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some
web site
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websites
show examples
are affordable. So
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this
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these
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are the main benefits we can enjoy using
this
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method.
Furthermore
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,
in
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apply
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many schools and
universties
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universities
now use online devices for their education specialy,
in
Rephrase
especially in
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universty lot of students avoid
books
Use synonyms
and other educational things as a example universty of tasmania remove all
their
Fix the agreement mistake
its
show examples
books
Use synonyms
and old items and
turn
Wrong verb form
turned
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into computer things. Nowadays, in our
society
Add a comma
society,
show examples
some
students
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students'
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income is very low
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therefore
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; therefore
show examples
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, some
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some time
Correct your spelling
sometimes
they can not afforde for their
tiution
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tuition
and
paper works
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paperwork
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
this
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is the worst part
in
Change preposition
of
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our society.
On the other hand
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,
smart phones
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smartphones
and laptops are realy chep price.
Moreover
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, some
web sites
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websites
and items
provide
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are provided
show examples
free of charge
like
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, like
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chatgpt
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ChatGPT
show examples
and
deepsick
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DeepSick
show examples
.
Due to
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this
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sitution meaning lot for poor kids. In conclusion, I
allways recommened
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always recommend
that we must avoid
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this
Fix the agreement mistake
these
show examples
papers and
books
Use synonyms
beacuse it is realy harmfull for environment and our kids.
According to
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my experince government must take
risk
Check wording
risks
show examples
for
this
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.

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task response
Answer the main question more clearly. Say why you agree, and also show you know the other side.
coherence and cohesion
Use main ideas that are easy to follow. One paragraph should have one clear point.
task response
Add better support for each point. Give one real and clear example, then explain it.
coherence and cohesion
Use link words in a simple way, like first, also, however, and in conclusion.
task response
Make your ideas more clear. Some sentences are hard to understand, so keep them short and direct.
coherence and cohesion
Check that each paragraph has a topic and stays on that topic.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the introduction and conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
You try to give examples about school, cost, and the environment.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital mediums
  • visual and auditory learners
  • engagement
  • comprehension
  • outdated
  • interactive media
  • real-life scenarios
  • personalized learning
  • ecological impact
  • digital divide
  • screen time
  • tactile experience
  • memory retention
  • irreplaceable
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