Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others believe there are better ways to reduce crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that
crime
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remains a major concern in many societies. Some people believe that increasing the length of
prison
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sentences
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is the most effective way to reduce
crime
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,
while
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others argue that alternative measures may be more beneficial. In
this
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essay, an attempt will be made to examine both perspectives. Those who support longer
prison
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sentences
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provide some reasons to justify their view. One of the most apparent reasons is that harsher punishments can act as a deterrent. To illustrate, individuals may be less likely to commit crimes if they fear severe consequences.
For instance
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, longer
sentences
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can prevent offenders from re-entering society and committing
further
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crimes during that period.
In addition
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,
such
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measures may provide a sense of justice and security for victims and the public. Those who disagree with the above idea
also
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have some points that should not be overlooked. One major reason is that addressing the root causes of
crime
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can be more effective in the long term. To clarify, factors
such
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as poverty, lack of education, and unemployment often contribute to criminal behaviour.
For example
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, providing education, job opportunities, and rehabilitation programmes can help prevent individuals from committing crimes.
Furthermore
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, shorter
sentences
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combined with rehabilitation may reduce reoffending rates more effectively than punishment alone. To recapitulate, it is evident that longer
prison
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sentences
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may deter
crime
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and ensure public safety,
while
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alternative approaches focus on prevention and long-term solutions. Having considered both sides thoroughly, I have personally come to believe that there are better ways to reduce
crime
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than simply increasing
prison
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sentences
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, particularly by addressing underlying social issues and supporting rehabilitation.

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task response
Make your opinion more clear in the second body part, not only at the end.
task response
Add one more real and clear example to make your ideas stronger.
task response
Explain a few main ideas more deeply, so the reader can see exactly why they work.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with more care. Some phrases like 'To recapitulate' sound a bit forced.
coherence and cohesion
Make some topic sentences more direct, so each paragraph goal is very easy to see.
coherence and cohesion
Connect examples to the main point more fully after each example.
task response
You answered both views and gave your own opinion clearly.
task response
Your essay stays on topic from start to end.
task response
Your ideas are easy to follow and mostly clear.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is logical and easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You use linking words to guide the reader through the essay.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crime
  • prison
  • jail
  • sentence
  • longer
  • punishment
  • deter
  • deterrence
  • keep safe
  • remove danger
  • cost
  • money
  • crowding
  • rehab
  • rehabilitation
  • prevention
  • education
  • jobs
  • housing
  • health
  • mental health
  • addiction
  • early intervention
  • support
  • programs
  • probation
  • community service
  • fines
  • alternative penalties
  • fairness
  • justice
  • equal
  • repeat crime
  • reoffend
  • root causes
  • poverty
  • policy
  • government
  • invest
  • effectiveness
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