IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2

Some people think that modern communication technology is having a negative effect on social relationships. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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The given
blue print
Correct your spelling
blueprint
 compares essential changes in the science
park
Use synonyms
 between 2008 and
present
Correct article usage
the present
show examples
 time.
Overall
Linking Words
, the area of
this
Linking Words
park
Use synonyms
 has been fixed up more effectively and has a
bigger amount
Check wording
larger number
show examples
 of paths and offices.
Firstly
Linking Words
, in 2008, in the north-west, there was woodland and grassland
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
however
Linking Words
, today the rooftop size has
to knock
Wrong verb form
been knocked
show examples
 down and the research and development office
new
Wrong verb form
has been newly
show examples
 constructed. Meanwhile, it is visible in the southeast
earlier
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 there was grassland and
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
size of cyber security
Check wording
cybersecurity
show examples
 part , but
green
Correct article usage
the green
show examples
 area
except
Punctuation problem
, except
show examples
woodland
Change preposition
for the woodland
show examples
destroyed
Verb problem
, was destroyed
show examples
 and the
are
Use the right word
area
show examples
 is used to expand cyber security area.
Moreover
Linking Words
, in the south , as compared to previous years, station is spring up onto railway, between the innovation centre and cyber security. Moving towards the rest of the information, in the past era, there was
reception
Correct article usage
a reception
show examples
 just under the offices, but it is not available at
this
Linking Words
 time.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the reception is replaced by
university
Correct article usage
a university
show examples
 hub.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 1995, there was cark
park
Use synonyms
 with
rectangular
Correct article usage
a rectangular
show examples
 shape,
whereas
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 now , the
are
Use the right word
area
show examples
 of
car
Correct article usage
the car
show examples
park
Use synonyms
 decreases and seems
as
Verb problem
to be
show examples
 a square shape.

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coherence cohesion
Write about the main changes first, then group details by area in a clear way.
coherence cohesion
Use short sentences. Many parts are hard to follow because of word order and grammar mistakes.
coherence cohesion
Add a clear ending sentence to sum up the biggest changes.
task achievement
Make sure every sentence matches the map. Some lines are not clear or may be wrong.
task achievement
Use simple and exact words like 'was built', 'was removed', and 'was expanded'.
task achievement
Cover all key changes, but do not add unclear ideas such as 'rooftop size'.
task achievement
You gave an overview, which is very important in this task.
coherence cohesion
You tried to compare past and present in each part of the map.
task achievement
You included some key places like the station, office, hub, and car park.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • face-to-face interactions
  • superficial relationships
  • meaningful conversations
  • notifications
  • long-distance relationships
  • online communities
  • social networks
  • social anxiety
  • digital communication
  • real-world interactions
  • over-reliance
  • detrimental effect
  • inhibit
  • deep social connections
  • distract
What to do next:
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