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Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to self-educate their children at home rather than sending them to school. Do advantages of home education outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, the majority of
parents
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 prefer to teach their
children
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 themselves rather than educate them at school.
While
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 there are some visible downsides,
such
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 as limited social
skills
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 and unqualified
parents
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, I believe the upsides - individual learning and a flexible environment - can be far greater. One concern of educating
children
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 at
home
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 can be a lack of social
skills
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. With students being taught and surrounded by like-minded peers, students usually have opportunities to make friends and work in groups, which often cannot be provided by
parents
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.
This
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 means that they may have less experience communicating with different people in the long term. Another negative side may be
parents
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 who do not have qualifications in the teaching sphere. Unlike school teachers, not all
parents
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 have the knowledge or teaching
skills
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 for every subject, meaning that
children
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 may receive a lower quality of education compared to school.
However
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, these disadvantages are outweighed by the benefits of educating
children
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 from
home
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,
such
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 as the flexibility of the environment. Families can choose their own schedules and learning methods, allowing
children
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 to study when they are most productive and comfortable. A major upside is that
home
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 education provides individual learning.
Parents
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 can adapt lessons to their
children
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's strengths and weaknesses, helping them improve more quickly than in a traditional classroom where one teacher often focuses on many students simultaneously. In conclusion, even though delivering education at
home
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 has some negative sides, like unqualified
parents
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 and a shortage of social
skills
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, the positive sides of it outweigh them with convenience and adaptability to the learner's pace.

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task response
For task response, add one more clear example to show why home study is better. This will make your answer stronger.
task response
For task response, explain a little more why the good points are stronger than the bad points.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, some ideas can link more smoothly. Use simple linking words like 'also', 'for example', and 'because' in a careful way.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, avoid repeating words like 'students' and 'parents' too much. This can make the flow better.
task response
For task response, you answer the question clearly and give your opinion from the start.
task response
For task response, you cover both disadvantages and advantages in a balanced way.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, each paragraph has one main idea, so it is easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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