Nowadays parents are sending their children to trips abroad for educational purpose. What are the advantages and disadvantages of it?

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Recently, there has been a debate about sending young learners to
study
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abroad. Some families believe that it is the best choice for their
children
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.
While
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the latter agrees with teaching their school-age
children
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in the same country or even in a home school. There are benefits and drawbacks to
this
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statement, and here we will know what they are and why. On the one hand, one major benefit of studying abroad is that
children
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become more independent. They will be responsible for cooking, cleaning, paying bills and saving money.
For instance
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, a
study
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conducted in several European countries found that young learners who studied abroad developed better communication skills and grew more independent than those who stayed in their home countries. That's why parents want to send their
children
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. Because it helps kids become not only independent, but
also
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more skilled.
On the other hand
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,
this
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trend has several drawbacks.
However
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, one major disadvantage is that school-age
children
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may find it difficult to live in a new country
,
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apply
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and learn a foreign
language
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. Because the
language
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barrier can be a problem in daily life. These challenges make them feel exhausted and depressed if they can't understand the
language
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.
For example
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, if some
children
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from the United Kingdom went to
study
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in South Korea, and they don't know how to speak the Korean
language
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, they may find it difficult to countine the education.
As a result
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, families prefer to keep their
children
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in the same country to learn and live better than these difficulties. In conclusion,
while
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there are many advantages to sending kids to
study
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abroad, there are
also
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drawbacks and challenges that should be taken into consideration. It depends on the parents and their
children
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, what’s better for them to learn in a safe environment.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more full way. You talk about good and bad points, but some ideas are short.
coherence and cohesion
Make your main idea very clear at the start of each body part.
task response
Add one more clear example or detail for each main point.
coherence and cohesion
Do not use very short linkers like 'Because' as a full sentence. Join ideas in one full sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Use simple and clear topic sentences. This will help the reader follow your plan.
task response
Your conclusion is good, but it can be stronger if you clearly repeat the main good point and the main bad point.
task response
You answer the question and talk about both advantages and disadvantages.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You use examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
The order of ideas is easy to follow most of the time.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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