IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

You are planning a week long vacation, and you need someone to take care of your house while you are away. Write a letter to your neighbour. In your letter, - tell your neighbour that you are going away - ask your neighbour to take care of your house for you - explain what tasks you would like your neighbour to do.

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Dear Sam, I am writing you
this
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 letter
in regards to
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regarding
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 my upcoming
vocation
Use the right word
vacation
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at the end
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 of
this
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 month. As you may know, my work includes multiple tasks, projects and long working hours. I have become quite exhausted, which leads to less productivity at work. Which is why I have decided to take a week-long vacation and go to Miami to relax and enjoy myself.
However
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, I do not have any family members who can take care of my home in my absence.
Thus
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, I humbly request you to stay and take care of my residence. It will not only help me to keep my house clean and maintained but
also
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 provide you
a
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with a
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space to live in
,
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apply
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 during the renovation at your home. Other than that, can you please water my plants at least 3-4 times a week, in the morning and vacuum the carpets in the living room? I would really appreciate your help in
this
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 matter. Your sincerely, Prabhjot Singh Gill

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task response
Say the exact days you will be away. Also say if Sam needs to stay in the house or only visit it.
task response
Make the request more direct: ask Sam to check the house, get the post, and make sure the doors and windows are safe.
coherence and cohesion
Use a more friendly first line, such as: “I hope you are well.” This fits a letter to a neighbour.
coherence and cohesion
Keep your reason for the trip short. The long part about work is not needed for this letter.
coherence and cohesion
Put all the house jobs in one clear list or one short paragraph. End with “Yours sincerely,” not “Your sincerely.”
task response
You say when you will go away, ask Sam for help, and give clear jobs: water the plants and clean the carpets.
coherence and cohesion
Your letter has clear parts: the trip, the request, the jobs, and a polite end.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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