APRIL 29 Part 1: The bar chart below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over of three countries in 1980 and 2000 and prediction in 2030.

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APRIL 29 Part 1: The bar chart below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over of three countries in 1980 and 2000 and prediction in 2030.
IELTS Writing Task Chart for APRIL 29 Part 1: The bar chart below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over of three countries in 1980 and 2000 and prediction in 2030.
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of retired people in three countries — Canada, Germany and
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
between 1980 and 2030. ​
Overall
Linking Words
, the percentage of elderly people saw an increase in three different
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
. Meanwhile, the figure for Germany was highest
at the end
Linking Words
of the year. ​
It is clear that
Linking Words
the percentage of people who
aged
Verb problem
were aged
show examples
65 in Canada consisted of 10% in 1980. It
then
Linking Words
witnessed a climb from 20% to 23% in 2030 from
it's
Use the right word
its
show examples
initial 10% in 1980.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
germans
Capitalize the proper name
Germans
show examples
aged 65 or over experienced a growth from 15% to 25%
with
Punctuation problem
, with
show examples
the largest figure compared to other countries over the period. ​It can be clearly seen that the percentage of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
aged 65 or over in the UK witnessed a significant rise from approximately 14% to 17% in the final year.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the proportion of elderly residents in the UK grew steadily throughout
this
Linking Words
whole period.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "proportion" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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