Television dominates the free-time for too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socializing with others. Do you agree or disagree? Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Nowadays
television
has become very important for most of the
people
.
Television
is one of the most attractive scientific technology for
people
, many
people
have
h
Add an article
a
the

The noun phrase habit seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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abit of watching only
television
in their spare
time
.
Although
,
people
have lots of work to do in their free
time
but
Remove the conjunction
apply

It appears that the word but is unnecessary in this sentence. Consider removing it.

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due to dramas and programs
people
ignore their other activities. I
am agree
Change the verb form
agree

It appears that the form of the verb agree does not work with am in this sentence.

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with
this
statement and I will share my views related to
this
. Most of the
people
includes
Change the verb form
include

The singular verb includes does not appear to agree with the plural subject Most. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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watching
television
in their hobby, they think that it is useful for them. Undoubtedly
television
is good for entertainment, but it necessary to watch it within a limit. Most of the
people
watch
television
in front of their children, so definitely children
also
want it to watch and because of
this
they cannot concentrate on their studies properly. On another hand, watching
television
have lots of negative effects on our social lives.
For example
, a family having lunch or dinner together and all are watching
television
, so at that
time
it is good to discuss or share their thoughts rather than watching
television
because they should realize
it
Correct your spelling
is

The word it doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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that it is
v
Add an article
a

The noun phrase very important moment seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ery important moment for them.
Furthermore
, most of the
people
are busy due to job and after coming back to
h
Add an article
the
a

The noun phrase home seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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ome they are habitual of watching
television
, they not give
time
to their family and
also
avoid to meet their friends and relatives.
Moreover
, if there is
w
Add an article
a
the

The noun phrase weekend seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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eekend or holiday
people
at that
time
like to stay at home and not have
i
Add an article
an

It appears that an article is missing before the word interest. Consider adding the article.

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nterest to socialize with their friends, due to which relationships gets weak. Many of the
people
have awareness about the negative impact of
the
Remove the article
apply

It appears that the is unnecessary in this context. Consider removing it.

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watching
television
on our health. It
Replace the word
affects

The word effects may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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effects
Correct your spelling
affects

The word effects doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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our eyes, mind and body. Many doctors
says
Change the verb form
say

The singular verb says does not appear to agree with the plural subject doctors. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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that, watching too much
television
can
effect
Correct your spelling
affect

The word effect doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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on our cardiovascular system and
people
those are habitual for sitting in front of
t
Add an article
the
a

The noun phrase television seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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elevision for
l
Add an article
a

The noun phrase longer time seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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onger
time
can
also
gain weight and due to
this
the have to suffer
with
Change the preposition
from

The preposition with after the verb suffer may be incorrect. Consider changing it to another preposition.

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the problems that
occurs
Change the verb form
occur

The singular verb occurs does not appear to agree with the plural subject the problems. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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due to obesity. In conclusion,
people
should have to adapt activities that are good for their health and whenever possible it is good to socialize with friends and relatives. Watching
television
will only make
people
inactive and will develop
l
Add an article
a

It appears that an article is missing before the word lack. Consider adding the article.

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ack of interest in other useful activities
Submitted by nizarlightwala on

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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