All over the world, the number of overweight people is growing. What do you feel are the main causes of this? What are the effects?

#world #people #effects

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Globally, the worldwide percentage of obese individuals is rapidly increasing. Major reason's for

this

are

firstly

, the adoption of a sedentary lifestyle and

secondly

, unhealthy

food

choices.

However

, these obstacles can be overcome by many solutions.

To begin

with, a high BMI is due to unhealthy lifestyle trends in the

21 st

Suggestion

21s t

century. With busy everyday lives, we gravitate towards easy lunch and dinner options

such

as, fast

Suggestion

as fast food,

food

and microwaveable meals, which are high in sugar and fat content. To illustrate, a study conducted by the American obesity society found that

fast

Suggestion

the fast food industry market

food

industry market has tripled since the

year

2000.

Moreover

, people do not find the time to include

exercise

in their everyday lives.

This

is because

exercise

is key in burning fats and building

muscle which

Accept comma addition

muscle, which

in turn reduces your total body fat percentage.

This

lack of

exercise

combined with unhealthy eating is a recipe for disaster. The aftermath's of obesity are countless. The biggest one is that it leads to massive health deterioration, through the interactions

occuring

come to pass

occurring

through our

bodies

Suggestion

body's

body

physiology,

specfically

in distinction from others

specifically

, the negative interaction of fat and cells.

For example

, overweight people are 70% more likely to develop diseases

such

as heart failure, hypertension and diabetes, the leading causes for death worldwide.

This

causes early morbidity in younger individuals.

Furthermore

, person's with body mass index higher than 30

result

Suggestion

results

in massive losses to the

healthcare

Suggestion

health care

system every

year

. Due to the liability of their diseases, millions of dollars are spent each

year

on their medication.

For example

, a study by the NHS in 2018, found that 50% of hospital beds each

year

were occupied by over weight

indivisuals

a human being

individuals

. In conclusion, awareness and implementation of healthy

food

options

Accept space

as well as, more vigorous global

exercise

schemes will help in solving the issue of the rise worldwide fat rates.

Consequently

, preventing the consequences that

arise

Accept comma addition

arise, such

such

as increased morbidity rates.

Submitted by leena_likey on Sun Apr 07 2019

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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All over the world, the number of overweight people is growing. What do you feel are the main causes of this? What are the effects?

Some people say that the government should invest in trains and subway system to prevent traffic congestion in large cities. Others, however, think it should build wider roads. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadayys, a growing number of people with heatlh problems are trying an alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some peple think that cities are the best place to live. Others prefer to live in the countryside. Discuss both views and guve your own opinions.

Nowdays, many people have to work long time, and they feel more stressful than before. What are the reasons? What employers can do to make their life easier?