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Writing Samples
Band 5

Additional economic wealth happiness in rich countries. Do you agree or disagree?

#wealth #happiness #countries
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Some people think that the growth of
economic
Suggestion
economy
economies
economist
economics
 is likely to be a key role regarding the achievement of happy values, especially in developed countries. Meanwhile, I do believe that valuable economic is merely a part of
happiness
Use synonyms
. It becomes apparent that the more
prosperity
Suggestion
prosperous
 each country builds, the more democracy each citizen enjoys. Rich countries which are unlikely to appear more dangerous criminals like murder and robbery bring the safe and
higher
Suggestion
high
 quality life. It is no doubt that so terribly does lack of
money
Use synonyms
 cause that all residents concrete to earn much
money
Use synonyms
 with
method diversity
Accept comma addition
method, diversity
 as well as feeling nervous to carefully keep own properties. Some developed countries, especially those which are well-known as modern civilized areas, may have plenty of laughs and a long-time life.
Consequently
Linking Words
, its rich
economic
Suggestion
economy
 involves to joyful sentiment in a
countries
Suggestion
country
 in general. On the one hand, it is true that there were a dose of factors affecting to the peacefulness and
happiness
Use synonyms
 of individual person
such
Linking Words
 as friend and family. In fact, people do earn a love from parents, which is the carefulness without strings attached and
money
Use synonyms
. It can be seen obviously that unconditional love is like
muscle
Suggestion
a muscle
, it needs a daily workout in spite of either fewer or much
money
Use synonyms
 all around the world. Vietnam,
for instance
Linking Words
, can be seen as developing country that the percentage of
happiness
Use synonyms
 is the same as happy as the proportion of
more rich
Suggestion
richer
 countries. In conclusion, generally economy development sees a tool to create the enjoyment in each wealth country.
However
Linking Words
, it is evident that there was a variety of sectors to boost the peacefulness and
happiness
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by dien.lnl on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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