IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Many parents today organize extra classes for their children after school and at the weekends. Do you feel this is a worthwhile thing to do or do you feel children have enough education at school? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#parents #classes #children #school #weekends #education
Nowadays, the fact that children take extra lessons outside the curriculum is getting more and more popular in many countries, especially in Asia, and lots of parents argue that it is necessary to do. From my perspective, students should be encouraged to have more time to develop their soft skills
instead
 of taking more academic lessons. In my view, going to cram schools is unnecessary as learners are educated enough at
school
. To illustrate,
school
-goers have to study a wide range of subjects, and these subjects provide them with adequate academic background.
Thus
, students do have opportunities to practice knowledge through homework tasks.
For instance
, after listening to chemistry lessons at
school
, home assignment offers students a chance to reinforce their knowledge. I believe that by combining the methods taught by educators during
school
 hours and doing homework at home, children are academically educated enough. Meanwhile, I support the idea of taking extra classes for skill enhancement.
School
 hours might be not enough for students to develop all-round
skills but
Accept comma addition
skills, but
 only allow them to improve
intellectual level
Suggestion
the intellectual level
. In order to fully develop, it is recommended that children be organized to take soft skill lessons.
For example
, after
school
 or at the weekend, kids can be sent to piano classes
instead
 of an additional mathematics class. I hold the belief that parents should let their children have more time to develop other skills rather than only focusing on academic development. In conclusion, I believe that children might be able to have adequate knowledge during
school
hours but
Accept comma addition
hours, but
 should be encouraged to have soft skills training courses.
Submitted by thanhx5mavanbitrung on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: