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Band 6

Some people believe that the biggest problem facing cities is the increasing number of cars. Others say there more serious problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #cities #cars
In recent years, major causes of
pollution
has become
Suggestion
have become
debatable
Suggestion
debates
. Many individuals share the viewpoint that the most significant issue is the rise in the amount of vehicles because
this
 increases environmental
pollution
. I am of the opinion that there are more detrimental setbacks
such
 as, usage of
plastic
 materials and building of industries within the towns. Those who support the view that the most significant issue is vehicles may argue on the basis of increase environmental
pollution
.
In other words
, one of the major causes of air pollutant is the fumes released from machines. Take
for example
, the city of Lagos, according to the Global
health
a healthy state of wellbeing free from disease
Health
 Institute in 2017, revealed that, we produced approximately 2.3 million tons of smoke which has drastically risen from about 1.2 million tons in 1990.
Thus
, resulting in one of the leading factors of air
pollution
.
However
, I would argue that, while the rationale above is
correct there
Accept comma addition
correct, there
 are many major factors affecting our communities. One of
such
 is, the use of
plastic
 bags.
This
 implies that, the use of rubber materials
such
 as bags and bottles has caused more harm than good resulting in land, water and air
pollution
. According to a research carried out by the United Nations in 2019,
for instance
, revealed that about 600 million tons of
plastic
 wastes are being produced yearly around the world, and since they are non biodegradable it takes 100 to 1000 years for
such
 waste to eventually leave the earth.
As a result
, more damage is being done to not only the
land but
Accept comma addition
land, but
also
 the ocean beds and the atmosphere, of
such
 materials are eventually burnt. In conclusion, while I believe that smoke released from cars are dangerous to the environment, I am of the opinion that there are more major factors that affect our surroundings
such
as,
Suggestion
as plastic bags,
plastic
 bags and bottles.
Submitted by werepe2000 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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