It is quite common for both parents in a family to work. Sometimes this is because they need two salaries to survive whereas other times it is their choice. What are the problems you see in this situation? How does this affect the children and the family life? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

In
this
money driven world, it is not uncommon to see both the partners in a family to be working to fulfil the family needs or
otherwise
.
This
situation has given rise to many problems for children as well as family. On one hand, because of spending extended number of hours at
workplace
Suggestion
the workplace
a workplace
, the children are usually rendered unattended by both the parents, which makes them pray of bad habits
such
as enormous hours spent on playing games and watching television.
Moreover
, Children in
such
houses are often seen to be indulged in bad company as they are not mature enough to distinguish between rights and wrongs.
For instance
, according to a research, around 60 percent of the children of the households, where both parents are doing jobs, are seen to be indulged in illegal activities.
On the other hand
,
such
scenario
also
has an adverse effect the family life too.
Firstly
, as the members of the family spend
least time
Suggestion
less time
together, it results in having weak family bond.
Secondly
, it
also
raises the problem of poor mental health of the family members as they are exposed to
constant pressure
Suggestion
the constant pressure
of work as well as home chores.
Last
but not the least, the intimacy and respect among the couples deteriorate, which, in turn, give rise to fights and arguments. To illustrate, the divorce rate among the young couples has
arisen
(of e.g. celestial bodies) above the horizon
risen
to 20 percent because of spending less time together and more at work. To conclude, albeit earning money is a necessity in today’s world,
however
, it should not be done at the cost of ignoring family and children.
Submitted by hopemuc on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: